Everlasting
by Anjirika
Summary: Things after "First Strike" developed a little bit differently allowing Elizabeth and John to see that somethings are everlasting. This is an AU version of the journey that Atlantis takes, and the everlasting nature of her people. Please read and review.
1. Prologue: Coil Unwound

A/N- I am fed up with TPTB and the spoilers and rumours for season 4. If they are going to do the things proposed then they should do it right and this is my attempt to do it right. So, MAJOR SPOILERS for Season 4 of Stargate Atlantis, although this is how I want things to go, not how they will probably go... but that's alright with me.

_Through all the changes, some things are everlasting..._

**Everlasting**

**1. Coil Unwound**

He was standing on their balcony. The control room was behind him and although the doors were closed he knew that everyone there was in quiet contemplation. To say that the last few months had been a rollercoaster would be a gross understatement. It started with something that was border-line immoral, and ended with something that could only be described as horribly unfair and wicked. And now, as he stood in the dying light of their new home, John Sheppard couldn't help but wonder if Elizabeth hadn't been right all along.

_I'm sorry sir, but I can't help but think that we're somehow responsible for this._

'If I had only listened to her…' John thought despairingly to himself. '…if I had only tried to convince Commander Ellis that going ahead with the first strike wasn't a good idea! If only…'

"You shouldn't blame yourself John…"

Her voice was soft as it whispered in his ear and John looked to his left and saw her standing there. Elizabeth was standing before him in a plain white gown, her hair flowing around her shoulders and her hazel eyes wide and full of life. All around her a white aura glowed and John knew that he was looking at her ascended form.

"-Lizabeth-!" He breathed out taking a halted step towards her.

"I'm here John." She answered quietly, her voice calm and sure. "I had to let you know that I was alright."

"So are you back?" He asked curiously, the shock of seeing her wearing off as he thought back to a half-forgotten conversation. "Or are you-"

"I am an ascended being now John." She explained apologetically. "I know what I said but- I can do more like this."

"Dr. Jackson thought so too." John pointed out, his brow furrowed. "And look where that got him."

"Yes." Elizabeth agreed with a small laugh as she clasped her hands in front of her and cast her gaze down to them. "I have been hearing stories about how us mortals from Earth have a very strange way of looking at things---- how we rock the boat to much."

"But you won't-" John stated knowingly, causing Elizabeth to catch his eye. "-never a rash decision when it comes to you right?"

_Now see- that is exactly the type of RASH decision that I was talking about_

"My decision to get where I am now was somewhat rash…" Elizabeth admitted with a sigh as she took a step towards John. "…but at the time, it was the only way that I could think of to save you---all of you---"

"And yourself," John added softly, taking another step towards her so now they were standing toe to toe. "-you had to save yourself."

"John," Elizabeth began with a sigh, shaking her head. "-Teyla once told me that you would do anything for any member of your team. Did you think that you were alone in that conviction?"

"Well I--er--"

"You have defended and protected me too many times to count John," Elizabeth paused and laughed at a memory before continuing. "-you even defended my honour once." Elizabeth sighed and looked out to their new sea-green ocean, placing her hands upon the railing of the balcony. "But you have to know that while you may be willing to lay down your life for any of us, we are willing to lay down our life for you."

"I just wish that it hadn't been you." John stated suddenly catching Elizabeth's gaze and her hand as it rested on the railing. "I have so many things to say to you…"

"I have so many things to say to you too John," Elizabeth agreed, looking into his mournful eyes, knowing that she was projecting the same loss. "-but my time is up-"

"You could always come back you know…" He pointed out hopefully, taking her hand and squeezing it- inwardly shocked that she was solid. "You could always retake human form..."

"I made a commitment." Elizabeth stated firmly, echoing her words of so long ago. "And besides," She continued, pulling her hand away and taking a step back. "-it doesn't seem right to just ascend to fix a problem and then de-ascend for my own gain…"

"But it wouldn't be for just your own gain!" John exclaimed, his frustration mounting slightly. "You'd be returning to the place that you belong! You'd be returning to the position that you committed yourself to three years ago!" John sighed and let his tense shoulders slump. "You'd be returning to the people whom you befriended, who care about you, who l--- love you."

"Oh John," Elizabeth sighed, her heart breaking at his last words. "If I only could-"

"Just promise me one thing," John interrupted, taking both her hands into his own; an intimate gesture that not only shocked Elizabeth but John as well.

"Anything…." Elizabeth agreed, squeezing John's hands as tight as she could.

"Promise me that I'll see you again one day."

"One day." Elizabeth promised with a nod and a smile as she kept a tight hold of John's hands even as she began to turn into white light. "One day we will meet again."

And with that Elizabeth was gone, leaving John standing alone on the balcony wondering if what he had just experienced was real or not. A part of him confirmed to himself that he had indeed seen Elizabeth and that she had promised him that one day they would meet again.

"I'll hold you to that Elizabeth." John whispered softly turning from the balcony and heading into the control room. "I'll hold you to that…"

And as he left, he could hear the waves of the sea crashing against the piers of Atlantis and interspersed with them he could have sworn that he had heard her sweet laughter and a promise in response.

"_We will meet again John, I swear that we will..."_

A/N- Hey all! I'm starting at the end, and the next chapter will be the beginning. Hope you liked it cause the rest of my story will be Season 4- Sparky style. :D Please Review! And look forward to the next chapter soon.


	2. Adrift

oOo

_At current consumption we've got 24 hours of power left. After that there's no shield. No shield, no atmosphere. No atmosphere no…_

_Can we use the Stargate?_

_In order to dial the gate it needs to be calibrated to a specific location. We are lost…look we dropped out of hyperspace WAY too soon. I have no idea where we are..._

oOo

**Chapter 2: Adrift**

"You have no idea where we are," John restated, trying to calm his racing heart.

There were just too many things to worry about, Elizabeth was in the infirmary, he was in charge and the city was loosing power rapidly. To make matters worse Commander Ellis was probably already at the new rendezvous site and Rodney was really and truly panicking…something that he rarely did. John knew that Rodney was melodramatic but as he looked at the scientist that he thought of like a little annoying brother, he could see real fear in Rodney's eyes. "…so what's the plan?"

"Plan?" Rodney asked as if John's question was the most ridiculous one in the world. "There is no plan. This was the plan, in fact this was your plan!"

"Yes it was my plan," John chastised, trying to keep the fear from his voice as well and allow the taunting about the impossible situation to come through. John hoped that that would snap Rodney out of his panic. "But come on Rodney, there has to be SOMETHING that you can do."

"You don't get it, do you?" Rodney snapped angrily.

"I get it," John replied as calmly as he could. "We're in the middle of space, with no way of knowing where we are because we came out of hyperspace too early and we can't dial the gate because the gate needs a fixed co-ordinate and.."

"..and that's it-" Rodney muttered, looking around his brain clearly working once more.

"What's it?" John asked, his heart starting to beat again with hope.

"Radek-" Rodney began turning to find the Czech a little bruised but otherwise no worse for wear. "-I need you to start running simulations-"

"Yes, yes Rodney-" Radek interrupted turning away. "-I see where you are going."

"Rodney-?" John asked, following Rodney as he walked to a control council that still had a working laptop on it.

"Shh…"

"Rodney!" John asked again, more forcefully this time.

"I said shut up for a moment…" Rodney snapped turning to face Radek. "-Radek, run simulations of our run through hyperspace against the star charts…"

"I know Rodney…"

"What's that going to do?" John asked as Radek started typing away furiously on several lap-tops.

"What's what going to do?" Rodney asked back, engrossed in his own data pad.

"Our hyperspace journey and the star charts…"

"By comparing the length of time we spent in hyperspace against the star charts I will be able to calculate exactly where we are." Rodney answered proudly, keeping an eye on Radek's calculations.

"How will that help us?" John asked, taking a step closer to Rodney, hoping that he would get a straight answer for once.

"Last year, one of the last standing goa'ulds named Ba'al managed to find a way to re-write the base code for the DHD's-"

"-and that will help us how?" John asked, hoping that Rodney had a point to make.

"This helps us because we know how he did it!" Rodney grinned and then realised that John needed more explanation. "Once I know where we area I will be able to fix our Stargate to our relative point in space and even though we're technically off the grid, I will be able to put us back on the grid and make the gate work again!"

"And then what?" John asked curiously, he liked Rodney's plan so far but it had a major hole in it. "We gate everyone back to Earth?"

"There isn't near enough power for that." Rodney scoffed, shaking his head in disagreement even though he realised where John was coming from.

"We do have a ZPM." John pointed out, his assessment instantly shot down by Rodney.

"Which is currently holding back the vacuum of space…" Rodney signed and shook his head. "..look we're just going to have to gate somewhere else in Pegasus."

"Where else could we possibly go?" Teyla asked, causing both John and Rodney to look at her.

"I don't know-" Rodney stated as though asking him was crazy. "-go ask Elizabeth."

"She has been taken to the infirmary." Teyla answered solemnly causing Rodney to start to freak out again.

"What?" Rodney exclaimed, horrified to learn that their fearless leader was out of commission.

"Dr. Keller doesn't know yet." John answered sombrely. "She said that she would have to get Elizabeth under a scanner."

_..Elizabeth? -----is she going to be okay?_

_I don't know yet. She took quite a fall and her pupils are sluggish. I'm gonna have to get her under a scanner…I'll know more in a bit._

"Oh god…" Rodney muttered, slumping down into a vacant chair, snapping John out of his own thoughts.

"Rodney-"

"This is all my fault." Rodney mumbled, not listening to John.

"Rodney…"

"If I had only gotten the shield up faster…" Rodney rambled on. "…if only I had checked the numbers one more time…"

"RODNEY!" John shouted, catching the scientists attention. "We're all still alive because of you… you did good..."

"Right." Rodney agreed half-heartedly with a small nod. "But we still need a place to gate too."

"Is there anyone who would take on so many?" Teyla asked, looking between John and Rodney watching as they racked their brains for an answer.

"There's always the Genii." Rodney pointed out with a small smile.

"You have got to be joking." John exclaimed half in horror, half in shock.

"They are a logical choice." Teyla agreed. "They have bases all over the galaxy, we could continue our fight from there."

"And what about the city?" John asked, refusing to follow through on the logical train of thought.

"She'll be dead in space." Rodney stated sadly, confirming all their worst fears. "We're going to have to abandon her. There's nothing that we can do."

"What about the jumpers?" John asked furiously, listening as Radek mumbled something in Czech. "The drones? We just can't-"

"Hey," Rodney began thinking of something, catching Radek's eye. "-why didn't we think to use the drones in the first place?"

"They could not have gotten through the shield Rodney." Radek explained patiently.

"Yes yes," Rodney agreed. "-but what about when we moved the asteroid in place and brought the city to the surface again…why didn't we think to use a drone then??"

"I don't know Rodney," John stated, frustrated that he hadn't thought of using the drones to destroy the Asuran weapon. "But what about the jumpers? What if we flew them out of here."

"All of them?" Rodney asked, not liking this plan.

"Well, we have enough people with the training and the gene-" John began only to be interrupted by a very upset Rodney.

"Correction. Had." Rodney waited a fraction of a second before continuing. "Carson."

"Carson." John agreed with a sigh before continuing. "Okay, so we leave one behind, with the rest of the city…"

"Which will have to be destroyed."

"What?" John asked, furious that Rodney would even suggest such a thing.

"Well, we can't just let the Wraith get their hands on our FTL drive." Rodney pointed out with a sigh. "Look I don't like the thought of destroying our home anymore than you do but I can not in all good conscious leave the Wraith their version of the holy grail."

"The wraith are hardly a threat now-" John pointed out with a smirk. "-too much in-fighting between the different factions."

"Yes, but they are still a threat." Rodney argued. "And once word gets out that Atlantis is just drifting in space, what do you think they are going to do?? They are going to come together and unify to conquer their new feeding ground…..am I wrong?"

"No." John agreed with a sigh. "You're not wrong."

"Good." Rodney stated with a curt nod. "Zelenka, how are those simulations going."

"I think we have our location Rodney."

"Good, so we start the evacuations then." Rodney ordered with a relieved sigh.

"No." John stated firmly. "Not until we speak to Ladon."

"What about Elizabeth?" Rodney asked as John turned away.

"I'm going to see her now." John explained running his hand through his hair. "Listen, Teyla, gather a team together and stand by to go through the gate."

"Understood."

"And Rodney-" John began, watching as the tired scientist jumped to his feet. "-get that gate up and working."

"Right."

And with that, John left the control room hearing Rodney barking out orders to everyone who was still standing and ready to work.

* * *

A/N- Hey all! Weekly Monday update here! Hope you all enjoyed this chapter and will review it! Thank you to belanna30, tynut127, Sunny2006, HeartyJessica, KeeganPaige and darkmoonvampire for reviewing chapter 1. I hope you all will review this chapter, and HeartyJessica, do not fear this story is just how I want season 4 to go. Elizabeth/ Torri H. is being reduced to recurring status and nothing is certain about her future on Atlantis- even though Joe Mallozzi said that it was 'possible' that she would make an appearance later in season 4. Other than that, hope you all enjoyed this story and will check out the other Sparky stories that I have posted. Till next Monday (or sooner).

A/N2- I've corrected the chapter number…


	3. Lifeline

**Chapter 3: Lifeline**

John knew, as he walked through the city that there was probably a thousand other things that he needed to be doing, but a huge part of him was being pulled to the infirmary. Usually, he couldn't stand to be in the infirmary, a side-effect of winding up in there one too many times; however for John whenever Elizabeth landed in the infirmary he just couldn't stay away. And as he walked, the events leading up to their current crisis ran through his mind.

oOo

_Can you believe this?_

_No…I mean, it seems too good to be true._

_What?_

_Well…if those nukes do what Ellis says they do…_

_Since we won back the city we haven't heard so much as a peep from the Replicators_

_Well…obviously they haven't gone away_

oOo

As he walked through the corridors leading to the infirmary, he saw many people running around and he knew that each of them would be doing what they could to prolong their situation. As for John, by the time he reached the infirmary and saw how utterly crowded and chaotic it was he couldn't help but think of how it had happened and how Elizabeth had felt about it.

oOo

…_hey!_

_Hey…_

_Colonel Ellis has asked me to join the mission._

_I know…_

_I was gonna stay behind in a cloaked jumper right aster they launched the warhead do some battle damage assessments_

_I know that too_

_They told me that you called Woolsey and General O'Neil and tried to get the whole thing called off._

_Yes I did._

_They didn't bite…?_

_They did not._

_Look… I know you think we're doing the wrong thing here but, uh.._

_John...Good luck_

oOo

Usually they would have bantered and tossed the idea back and forth. Usually they would have spent a couple hours on the balcony looking at the stars discussing the pros and cons of the situation- but they hadn't. With Commander Ellis around, everything was so cut and dry and John had found himself behaving like a good soldier and not questioning the orders- even though he had had a bad feeling in the pit of his stomach too. And he thought of his conversation with Ellis

oOo

…_if this satellite weapon is being powered by its home world, maybe we can neutralize it at the source_

_Well the __Apollo__ is in no condition to get in a battle right now. That beam took a lot out of our shield._

_No, we gotta do something._

_We __did__ do something_

_I'm sorry sir, but I can't help but think that we're somehow responsible for this._

_Why? Because Weir said so?_

_No sir. Because it's the truth._

_John, listen to me. I-uh- I've been over your record. I know you have your detractors but personally, I think you've done a hell of a job here._

_Thank you sir…_

_You__ should be running Atlantis. Not Doctor Weir._

_Well then, I'd be the man. Who would I have to rage against?_

_This isn't something to joke about_

_I'm not joking sir… I shouldn't be running Atlantis. It's a civilian run operation and in my opinion sir, Dr. Weir has done one hell of a job here over the past three years. She's faced things that no military commander save for General Hammond, General O'Neil and General Landry have faced and if it's not to bold of me to say sir- I think that she's handled herself __like__ a military commander in the situations that called for them._

_Sheppard-_

_If I may be dismissed sir, I have things that I need to check up on._

_Dismissed_

oOo

He had stuck up for Elizabeth then, and at that instant he had been reminded of his younger self. The John Sheppard who had defied orders to save a friend in Afghanistan, the same John Sheppard who because of his mouth and his defiance had gotten himself sent to Antarctica where he could forget the world and the world could forget him. And he had sounded the same John Sheppard who had argued with the great General O'Neill about joining the expedition in the first place.

'In that moment I came full circle…' John thought to himself, thinking back to another more recent memory.

oOo

…_attention all personnel, we are about to attempt to submerge the city. From what I understand, it could get a little bit bumpy. So this your last chance to secure equipment and get to the designated safe areas._

_We've come full circle- eh?_

_Yeah...feels that way. sigh Okay, take us down._

_Aye, aye Captain._

oOo

"Can I help you with something Colonel?" Dr. Keller asked as she came up to him, dressed in scrubs that were fairly bloody.

"What?" John asked snapping out of his thoughts. "Oh, I was just wondering how Elizabeth is doing?"

"She's stable for right now," Dr. Keller assured, her voice thick with tension. "-but I haven't gotten her under a scanner yet, I had some other pressing needs…"

"Oh, so when-"

"You should come back in a couple of hours," Keller informed. "-I'm just going to go clean up and then get her under a scanner-"

"-so a couple of hours?"

"A couple of hours." Dr. Keller informed before leaving John to his thoughts once more.

'A couple of hours…' John thought despairingly to himself, but luckily for him his worry was interrupted by Rodney over the radio.

They had gotten the gate working, and had contacted Ladon.

oOo

"Colonel Sheppard…" Ladon began, his face appearing on the screens of the control room. "…to what do I owe this honour?"

"Ladon," John began, not believing that he was going to say what he was going to say next. "I'm afraid that I have a favour to ask of you."

oOo

15 hours remaining….

"So the evacuation is going well then?" Teyla asked, coming up to Rodney who was over-seeing the latest group of scientists that were evacuating to one of Ladon's Genii bases.

"Uh- yeah." Rodney agreed with a nod. "Ladon has agreed to take as many of our people as possible into the main base and the rest will be split between the smaller worlds and New Athos."

"And what of Elizabeth?" Teyla asked, wringing her hands out of nervousness.

"Uh, Sheppard's actually just gone to see her now actually…" Rodney answered awkwardly, really afraid for his dear friend and wondering how John was going to be if Dr. Keller gave him bad news.

oOo

"So how's she doing doc?" John asked quietly, leaning against one of the walls of the now quiet infirmary.

"Well I have her stabilized for now…" Dr. Keller answered with a tired sigh. "…but the next twenty-four hours are going to be key."

"We don't have twenty-four hours" John stated worriedly, which caused Keller to bit her lip with concern too.

"How long do we have till the shield fails?"

"A little less than fifteen hours now I'd bet…" John answered, his gaze resting past Dr. Keller to Elizabeth's sleeping form. "…maybe a little more if Rodney can manage to figure something out with our naqueda generators."

"So what's the plan?"

"We're evacuating the city." John answered honestly, crossing his arms in front of his chest. "We've got the majority of the scientists gone now…"

"…where are we evacuating too?" Dr. Keller asked, hoping that they wouldn't have to move her patients for a good long while.

"We've called in a favour with Ladon," John explained. "-he's agreed to take as many as he can into the Gedini bases around the Pegasus Galaxy and the rest are going to go to new Athos."

"And when will the final evacuations take place?"

"As soon as possible…" John clarified with a sigh. "…Rodney doesn't want anyone here except for the senior staff, minus you of course- past the five hour mark. He doesn't want to risk the shield failing early."

"I can't move some of my patients now." Dr. Keller answered, sorry that she was throwing such a wrinkle into their plan. "Especially Dr. Weir-"

"Elizabeth can go in the last group"

"No." Dr. Keller clarified. "I mean that I can't move her at all. If I do, there is a very high chance that she'll get complications due to her injury."

"Complications?" John asked worriedly. "What kind of complications?"

"Life- ending complications."

"But you said-"

"Yes." Dr. Keller interrupted with a heavy sigh. "Yes she is stable for now, but she's really fragile. She's in a coma Colonel, and right now or any time within the next twenty four hours if I were to move her she could get fluid building up in her brain and if that happens I'll have to operate. And if that happens-" Dr. Keller stopped for a moment to rub the bridge of her nose. "-well then we're both defiantly stuck here."

"So we're going to need a new plan." John muttered, his eyes staying on Elizabeth, hoping for her sake that everything would be alright.

"Yes." Dr. Keller answered with a sigh, as one of Elizabeth's machines started to go haywire causing John's heart to jump into his throat. "And you better think of one quick because it looks like I'll have to take her into surgery."

oOo

10.5 hours and counting…

"You want me to what?" Rodney asked, walking away from John in disbelief.

"I want you to fix the hyper-drive engine…" John ordered, his voice commanding authority. "…and I don't want you to tell me that there isn't enough power Rodney cause you better find some. Elizabeth is in surgery to relieve the pressure of the fluid that's been building in her brain and can't be moved at all…"

"Isn't there something else that we can do?" Ronan asked, his right shoulder bandaged and his arm in a sling.

"I think this is our last hope." Rodney stated forlornly. "I don't know Sheppard, but I'll try."

* * *

A/N- Hello beloved readers and reviewers! Here's my weekly monday update on this lovely Sparky version of season 4 as promised:D Thank you to HeartyJessica, tynut127, lala and belanna30 for reviewing chapter 2 and I hope ya'all and more will review this chapter too! Look forward to the next chapter next monday! 


	4. Time Running Out

**Chapter 4: Time Running Out**

7 hours and counting…

John watched Elizabeth from the far side of the infirmary. She was finally out of surgery and Dr. Keller had told a nervous John that the prognosis was not good and that there was a chance that she would have to go under again- which was both dangerous and tricky.

As for John, there was a million and one things that he could have been- hell should have been doing but he just couldn't leave her side for more than a few hours at a time. He needed to be at her side, and even though she was pale as the moon and as still as a stone, just being in her presence was comforting.

But it was more than that, there was a part of him that needed to be there as much as he can, to let her know that he was there for her, just like he was there for her the last time she had been injured.

Slowly, John walked over to her bedside and sat down on a chair that had been brought up and tentatively took her hand. It was warm and was one of the few indications that she was still alive. This small measure of life gave John the much needed hope that she would be alright in the end… and although the infirmary was deadly quiet, he felt the need to speak in the stillness.

"Elizabeth…" John began quietly, absentmindedly rubbing the back of her hand with his thumb. "…I don't know if you can hear me but it worked last time so I hope that it will work this time…" John looked around and was reassured that there was no one in the infirmary, all the patients being evacuated hours before for their own good.

"…things are progressing okay. There's about seven hours till the shield fails but we've already gotten most of the remaining population evacuated. The Athosians and Ladon are granting us sanctuary. You were right about them Elizabeth… they are our allies now…." John paused and watched her still face for a moment before continuing.

"….Rodney's been busy trying to fix the power and the hyper-drive engines because you can't be moved right now. But Dr. Keller says that if your brain stays clear of fluid you'll be able to be moved eventually…" John paused again and took her hand into both of his and kissed it softly.

"…god Elizabeth-" He muttered, his voice low and hoarse. "-this is so much harder than it was the last time…at least this time I can hold your hand…." John paused for another moment and felt the rage and horror and shame and a myriad of other emotions bubble to the surface. "….God Elizabeth, I'm sorry. I am so sorry that you're in this situation. If I had only been able to get us out of there sooner then maybe…

….maybe you wouldn't be in this situation now."

"It's not your fault John." Elizabeth whispered, looking at John as he was silhouetted against the white background of her mind.

"He can't hear you…" Came her voice and Elizabeth looked to her left to see an image of herself standing there.

"Who are you?" The real Elizabeth asked.

"I am you." The image replied, her voice void of emotion. "I am your immortal soul. The part of you that will live on after you the 'ego' dies."

"Well, I'm sorry to say that I have no plans of dying just yet." Elizabeth stated firmly, taking John's hand within her own.

"What are you doing?" The image asked in concern as it faded into the white background. "What are you doing?"

"He was my lifeline once…" Elizabeth stated firmly, looking into the un-seeing eyes of John. "…he can do it again."

oOo

6 hours and counting…

"Elizabeth?" John asked suddenly, jolted from the small cat-nap that he had and looked at Elizabeth expecting a change, but of course there was none other than Dr. Keller, checking her readings.

"There's no change Colonel." Dr. Keller informed sadly. "But her readings are steady, I'll know more once I do some more tests…"

"Right," John agreed standing up awkwardly. "-I should be seeing to the last evacuation. Rodney wants everyone out of here in an hour…"

"…I don't know if that'll be possible." Dr. Keller admitted, biting her lip. "But I'll do my best…"

"That's all I can ask for…" John stated quietly turning to leave, but mid step he changed his mind and saw that Dr. Keller had gone to her office for something and John took this opportunity to lean over Elizabeth and kiss her softly on the forehead, jumping back once Dr. Keller had re-emerged. "…take care of her."

"Yes sir."

And John finally left the infirmary, leaving Dr. Jennifer Keller to wonder if he knew that she had been watching, and had seen how much he truly cared for their leader.

oOo

"Rodney," John began, walking into the control room where Rodney was checking and re-checking figures. "How goes it?"

"Not well…" Rodney admitted, looking exhausted.

"We still have six hours-"

"A little under six hours Sheppard," Rodney corrected, rubbing the bridge of his nose. "-and before you say anything the evacuation is practically complete, the only people left in the city are Elizabeth, Dr. Keller, myself, Zelenka, and you…"

"…everyone else is gone?" John asked, knowing that they were.

"Yes everyone is gone…" Rodney confirmed, as he bent down to start tinkering with the control panel.

"Not quite everyone." Teyla corrected coming up to John, Zelenka and Rodney with Ronan close behind her.

"I thought I told you two to go through the gate." John stated, looking to his team-mates. "That it would be safer."

"I'm not abandoning my home." Ronan stated simply. "Not again."

"Well none of us want to leave but-"

"…but I suggest that you find some way to move Elizabeth." Rodney interrupted, after a couple sparks came flying out of the top of the control panel.

"She can't be moved." Dr. Keller informed, running up the main stairs to the control room. "That's why I'm here, I need to know how our plan B is coming along…"

"….not so well by the look of things." John answered looking from the new CMO to Rodney. "Rodney, do we need a plan C?"

"Yes." Rodney snipped, looking up briefly. "Listen, in five hours the shield is going to fail and-"

"Rodney-" Zelenka interrupted when a couple panels started beeping wildly.

"-what?!??" Rodney snapped, looking at his fellow scientist.

"Ze shield." Zelenka explained, holding up his laptop for Rodney to see. "It has collapsed to its lowest sustainable level-"

"- it's just a thin shield between the buildings and the vacuum of space…" Rodney interrupted, his eyes opening wide in horror as déjà vu washed over him. "…oh this is not good…"

"What do we do Rodney?" John asked, to get Rodney to think of something. "Rodney?"

"Dr. Keller, can you move Elizabeth to a jumper?" Rodney asked, completely ignoring John.

"Yes but-"

"Good." Rodney interrupted before turning to Zelenka, "Dial the gate and recall Major Lorne, we're going to need someone to pilot that jumper if things don't go so well."

"What are you planning Rodney?" John asked as Zelenka went to work.

"If we can get Elizabeth to the jumper she, Dr. Keller and Major Lorne will be save when the shield fails."

"And what about the rest of us?" Ronan asked, his right arm hanging by his side. "Those of us who are staying behind…"

"…if the time comes-" Rodney began only to be interrupted by Ronan again.

"I am not abandoning my home…"

"…oh how noble of you." Rodney snarled, shaking his head. "Because I would have thought that living would be preferable instead of-"

"RODNEY." John yelled, catching the scientist's attention. "What about the rest of us…?"

"What about the rest of us…" Rodney muttered looking at the members of his team and Zelenka counting them in his head. 'Me, Zelenka, Ronan, Teyla and John that makes 5 and we have 5….' The idea hit him like lightning and he relayed it to the group. "…the rest of us will get into the five space suits that are kept in one of our storage sections. That'll give us about eight extra hours to fix the hyper-drive and at least get us to where we need to be…"

Lorne came through the gate and helped Dr. Keller get Elizabeth to one of the jumpers. Rodney and Zelenka began the delicate process of hooking up the naquadah generators to the chair and hyper-drive while John, Teyla and Ronan got the suits ready; the final hours counting down, and time running out.

* * *

A/N- Hello beloved readers! Your weekly monday update of Everlasting here:) So time is running out for our beloved team...hope you all can wait a week to find out! Thank you to SMBBOOKS, TerryFreak, tynut127, KeeganPaige and dear Anuna for reviewing chapter 3. I hope you 5 (and more) review this chapter too... :) Till next monday- in the mean time, check out my other sparky stories and review them, heaven knows this lovely pairing dominates my writing (though I am branching out).

A/N2- I've fixed the chapter number.


	5. Reunion

**Chapter 5: Reunion**

Time had officially run out. The shield had failed precisely when Rodney and Zelenka thought it would and they were now on borrowed time. Rodney and Zelenka rumbled around in their suits.

"How's coming down there?" John asked anxiously.

He was in the control room ready to get into the chair in case Rodney and Zelenka did what seemed to be the impossible. If worse came to worse, one of them was going to have to hook up on of their naquadah generators and manually dial earth. With the mid-way station complete they would be able to evacuate to earth- the only downside is that someone would have to stay behind to set the self destruct. And no one wanted to think about that or who it would be….

"It's coming…." Rodney snapped through the intercom, seriously annoyed with John's constant check ups. "..and don't you go prattling on about how much time we have left. I am well aware that we only have like what, four hours of air left…"

"…about that-" John cut in apprehensively. "-I thought these things were supposed to have days worth of air in them."

"Well we got the discount models…" Rodney sniped in anger. "…now will you please let me and Zelenka work!"

"Sorry…sorry…." John muttered in apology as Teyla and Ronan darkened the doorway to the chair room. "….just do your best Rodney. I have faith in you."

"As we all do." Teyla added glancing at John.

There was an unspoken connection there. John to her was not only a friend, but the sword that would wield a new future for her people and the Pegasus Galaxy as a whole. She had known that he and his people would be able to start a change that would alter the entire make up of her world. And so far he had. The wraiths were in fighting among themselves, too concerned with wiping each other out to even think about the humans in the Pegasus Galaxy. Her people lived in relative peace on New Athos and while she worried for their safety she knew that the only imminent threat in the galaxy was the Asurans and they were only interested on Atlantis.

"When do you think he will be finished?" Ronan asked, his voice resounding in Teyla's helmet and John's. "I mean we don't have that much air left."

"I know." John answered, looking at his watch. "We have less than four hours, and he said that it would take at least three to hook up the gate and dial out…."

"…so not that much time left." Ronan interrupted, shifting from one foot to the other.

"No." John confirmed. "Not that much time left at all….."

John let his sentence trail off as his thoughts drifted to the jumper bay and jumper one where Dr. Keller, Major Lorne and Elizabeth were. He knew that at the very worst, he would have to dial the gate to let them go back to Earth- but he wondered how Elizabeth was doing…..

oOo

Elizabeth in the meantime was standing in the jumper next to Dr. Keller who was quietly talking to Lorne. They were speaking too quietly for her to understand them, but even if they talked louder she still wouldn't be able to hear them. She felt as though her ears were stuffed with cotton balls and she was underwater…. all the sounds were muffled and as Elizabeth stared at the inside of the jumper she felt as though she was fading away.

She then decided to walk past Dr. Keller and Lorne who were sitting in the front portion of the jumper, and walked right through the window. She turned back and still saw them talking, and she also saw the still figure in the back and knew that it was herself. Whatever it meant that she was separated from her body, Elizabeth knew that it wasn't good but she also knew that her friends and family were in trouble and she had to help them.

And help them she did…

oOo

When Elizabeth found Rodney he was frantically attempting to fix the hyper-drive engine but it was no use. He couldn't cobble together enough power to get the engine's started without the ZPM and he had totally and completely run out of ideas and he was beginning to pray for a miracle.

'Do not worry Rodney…' Elizabeth whispered, feeling his anxiety and worry. '…I am here, I will help you.'

And with that Elizabeth extended her hand and allowed her essence to connect to the mind of Atlantis and she coaxed the dying city into life once more. Circuits sprang to life all around her, and through the network of pathways she could feel the edge of John's consciousness as he sat in the chair.

'I am here John…' She whispered silently to herself, though she directed her thoughts to John, lending him all the power that she could give him. '…I am here with you and I am not going to leave.'

oOo

'Elizabeth?' John thought to himself as he felt the city rumble to life beneath him. 'Elizabeth is that you?' Of course there was no answer, but John could feel an added but of strength coming from somewhere within Atlantis and that strength allowed his weary mind to activate the proper controls to get the city flying and before long they were within hyperspace heading towards their new home and their rendezvous with the _Apollo_ and Commander Elis.

oOo

The next couple hours went smoothly and Elizabeth gave all the power that she could to both the hyper-drive systems and to John. The effort was tiring, and somewhere at the back of her consciousness she could feel the itch of her dying body but she didn't care at the moment, she had to help get her people home. It was the least that she could do.

oOo

When they finally touched down Elizabeth felt her self get jerked back into her body and she was consumed by darkness. Although as the darkness closed in, she knew that they had made it to New Lantea and that everything would be fine from then on.

oOo

"It was the most amazing thing that I had ever seen…" Rodney muttered excitedly in the briefing with Ronan, Teyla, John and Elis present. "…all of a sudden the hyper-drive engines just sprung to life."

"Good for you for getting it working Dr. McKay-" Commander Elis began when he was cut off.

"You haven't been listening to me!" Rodney snipped, seeing out of the corner of his eye that John had a contemplative look on his face. "I did not get the hyper-drive engine to work, in fact I was almost positive that we were all going to die out there..."

"Something must have got the systems working-" Ronan suggested.

"It could have been one of the ancestors." Teyla stated, still clinging to her old belief that the ancestors/ ancients intervened in their lives. "One of them could have-"

"It was Elizabeth." John interrupted, causing all eyes to fall to him. "It was Elizabeth."

"And what give you that idea?" Elis asked sceptically as he looked down at his pad. "Dr. Keller tells me that Elizabeth has been in a coma this entire time."

"Yes." John agreed with a nod of his head. "But while I was piloting the city I felt- well I don't know what I felt, but it felt as though I could feel another human presence at the edge of my consciousness and I am almost positive that it was Elizabeth."

"How could that be?" Rodney asked equally as sceptically. "Elizabeth is still-"

'Colonel Sheppard come in-'

"What is it Dr. Keller?" John asked activating his radio.

"It's Elizabeth-" The young CMO answered, her voice wavering over the radio. "-she's awake, and she's been asking for you Colonel- all of you."

oOo

They were all tentative when entering the infirmary. John led the way with Rodney close behind and Teyla and Ronan kept their respectful distance while Commander Elis hung way back. They could all instantly see that she was better. Her face was less pale and she was sitting up slightly and there was a soft smile gracing her bruised features.

"Hey there…" She answered groggily as she saw her friends approaching. "…what did I miss?"

Her question was returned with grateful laughter and while Teyla, Ronan and Rodney chatted away to Elizabeth with all that had gone on in the last 24 hours John hung back and locked gaze with her every now and then and John mouthed 'Thank You' to her and she merely smiled her eyes saying 'You're Welcome.' They were connected as they had been when they were flying though hyperspace and the smile that they shared was an act that did not go un-noticed by Colonel Elis.

* * *

A/N- Hello beloved readers. I am SO sorry for the long delay, but I've been a little depressed where Sparky is concerned lately and it was only after seeing Torri at Polaris 21 last weekend that I got the-er- umph to keep going. So this chapter is up and the next one is on its way... I hope you enjoy and I hope that you guys will review this one. Oh, and thanks to JadedOne47, TerryFreak, SMBBooks, Sunny2006 and Suzotchka1 for reviewing! I love you guys and I hope that you five will review this chapter along with the rest of my beloved readers... 


	6. Doppelganger

**Chapter 6: Doppelganger**

_Doppelganger: a ghostly double of a living person that haunts its living counterpart_

oOo

_You shouldn't be alive Elizabeth_

The image was haunting, its featureless voice haunting her nightmares.

_You should have died that day in space with the rest of your friends._

She was trapped in an endless maze of the Atlantean corridors and she didn't know how to get out.

_You escaped your fate-_

Though the voice was haunting she felt as though something or someone stronger was pulling her away from the nightmare.

_But do not worry, you shall return to it once more-_

oOo

"Hey there-" John whispered as Elizabeth opened her eyes. "-sleeping beauty, you looked as though you were having a nightmare."

"I was…" Elizabeth answered honestly as she sat up.

It had been two weeks since their settlement on New Lantea but in the damage done by the Asuran weapon their main dialling control panel was damaged, thus leaving them completely cut off from Earth. The _Apollo_ with Elis on it had instantly gone back to Earth leaving the city to run as it always has with the small exception that everyone was essentially trapped.

"…I was." Elizabeth continued as she saw John pull out his favourite book 'Princess Bride' from his bag. "But it's gone now- you chased it away."

"Glad that I could be of service-" John flirted doing a mock bow before turning gravely serious as he began to flip though the pages. "-now do you remember where we ended yesterday?"

"Yes." She answered warmly with a glowing smile. "We were right around the part where Buttercup realises that the man in black is her beloved Westley…"

"Right, right…" He muttered as he flipped through the pages to 164 and began reading. "… 'You can die to for all I care-' she said and then she turned away. Words followed her. Whispered from far, weak and warm and familiar. "As…you…wish…" Down in the mountaints, Buttercup turned back to the source of the sound and stared down as in first light, the man in black struggled to remove his mask. "Oh, my sweet Westley," Buttercup said. "What have I done to you now?" From the bottom of the ravine there came only silence…"

John read and read and Elizabeth let his voice wash over her. It was soothing and expressive and wonderful and she could see the story unfolding within her mind. A couple pages later, 173 to be exact Elizabeth stopped John to point something out that had always bugged her.

"So this is the part where S. Morgenstern skipped the reunion scene right?"

"That's right…" John confirmed placing the book on his knees. "…why do you ask?"

"Well, it just doesn't make any sense." Elizabeth continued. "Buttercup and Westley have been away for so long, you would think that he would have given the readers the satisfaction of seeing them come together again."

"You would think." John agreed. "But Goldman says here that Morgenstern wanted his characters to have a bit of privacy…"

"…what privacy?" Elizabeth asked. "They are characters in a book."

"I know." John agreed with a smile. "But in the movie they put that scene in."

"Can you recite it for me John?" Elizabeth asked, her hazel eyes begging him. "I know you've watched the movie hundreds of times."

"Word for word or will the gist do?"

"Oh word for word John," Elizabeth begged with a smile. "-you know how I love that part."

"Oh alright…" John agreed with a sigh. He closed the book and took a deep breath before beginning. "Buttercup had just pushed the man in black off the cliff and he shouted back at her…

'As…..You…wish….'

And she walked to the precipice and looked down and whispered to herself

'Oh my sweet Westley, what have I done?' And then she threw her self off the cliff and they tumbled down it. They finally reached the bottom and after laying there for a moment catching their breaths they reached for each other and Westley took his beloved Buttercup into his arms and said in a concerned voice;

'Can you move at all?'"

"Move?" Elizabeth substituted a blush on her cheeks as she filled in for Buttercup, her voice going all light and airy as needed. "You're alive, if you want I can fly."

"I told you I would always come for you," John continued, imitating Westley. "Why didn't you wait for me?"

"Well…" Elizabeth began, pondering the question thoroughly. "…you were dead."

"Death cannot stop true love-" John stated sincerely his face inching towards Elizabeth's. "-all it can do is delay it for a while….."

"… I will never doubt again." She stated firmly her face inching towards his, their eyes locking.

"There will never be a need…"

"Well, there is a need for my patient to rest." Dr. Keller interrupted causing John and Elizabeth to jump back in fear, their gaze broken. "I'm sorry Colonel, but you'll have to continue the story later."

"But she just woke up-" John argued with a pout causing Elizabeth to giggle, and break the tension.

"Please," She asked hoping for a break. "- I did just wake up."

"I know that Dr. Weir-er-Elizabeth." Dr. Keller agreed. "But you are still my patient and you need as much sleep as you can get."

"Oh alright…." Elizabeth conceded before turning to John. "…can you come by this afternoon?"

"I'd be glad too." John stated with a smile as Dr. Keller turned and left them alone.

"Bring 'The Princess Bride' with you okay?"

"As you wish…"

Elizabeth's heart leapt to her throat as John turned and left. He had told her what Westley had told Buttercup for months as his own way of telling her that he loved her. And when John had said it there had been something in his eyes that she hadn't seen before and to Elizabeth's surprise she really hoped that what she saw was really there and had wanted it for a long time.

'But since when have I wanted to see something in his eyes….?'

oOo

She was walking down the stairs to the gate, everything was eerily quiet and everything was lit with an eerie blue-green light that was not a normal part of the Atlantean décor.

'What is going on here?' Elizabeth asked herself as she reached the bottom. 'Where is everyone?'

_Everyone is gone Elizabeth_

The voice was back and Elizabeth felt a shiver run down her spine.

_You shouldn't be alive_

The image was haunting, its featureless voice haunting her nightmares.

_You should have died that day in space with the rest of your friends._

She was trapped in an endless maze of the Atlantean corridors and she didn't know how to get out.

_You escaped your fate-_

Though the voice was haunting she felt as though something or someone stronger was pulling her away from the nightmare.

_But do not worry, you shall return to it once more-_

oOo

"You're having nightmares?" Kate Hieghtmeyer asked worriedly as she sat beside Elizabeth who was still confined to her hospital bed. "What of?"

"Nothing in particular-" Elizabeth admitted with a blush. "-it's just I've been having the same dream for the last little while. A week or so."

"What happens in them?"

"Well, the last one I had I was walking towards the gate and there was a voice- I don't remember what it said and then I was in a maze and…" Elizabeth sighed the details of the dream slipping away. "…and that's all I can remember."

"Well," Kate began slowly, wondering what to make of these nightmare's of Elizabeth's. "-I can ask Dr. Keller to prescribe you something to make you sleep through the night I know how much you need your rest."

"That would be lovely Kate thank you…"

Kate Hieghtmeyer left and did not leave Elizabeth content. She still felt as though something was wrong with her, but she knew that she would have to keep those thoughts to herself until she figured out what was going on- or got much better.

* * *

A/N- Hello beloved readers:D Here we go, another chapter. But before I do anything I must thank Anuna for letting me borrow the plot bunny of reading in the infirmary. The scene where John was reading to Elizabeth was borrowed from her story 'Sweet Cowboy Comfort' when Elizabeth read the same thing to him- of course I added a few important details. -giggle- but anyways thank you dear Suzotchka for being the only one of my reviewers to review the last chapter- I really apreciate it. I hope that you and others will review this one too and chapter 7 is being a pain in the behind so who knows when it will come out. But fear not beloved readers- it will come out eventually... 


	7. The Seer's Gift

**Chapter 7: The Seer's Gift**

"You have a strange aura girl…"

"Who me?" Teyla asked turning towards the old woman. She had scraggly grey hair and a very wrinkled face but her emerald green eyes sparkled in the dying sunlight. She was dressed in simple plain rags but she carried herself as though she was a queen and she held Teyla's attention.

"Yes you child-" The old woman confirmed taking Teyla by the hand and leading her away from her team. "-you are not all that you appear to be."

"I am sure that I do not know what you are talking about." Teyla replied defensively though her defences wavered when she saw the smile on the old woman's face.

"You are different than the rest of us." The old woman continued knowingly. "You can sense what we can not sense… and-" The woman paused as she leaned into whisper in Teyla's ear. "-and you have life growing within you."

oOo

Teyla jerked awake. She was back on Atlantis and had just had nothing more than a simple dream. But it was more than a dream; Teyla had dreamt and relived her team's last mission. They had gone to a planet where the villagers lived within a long crevice that split a mountain in two.

The planet had valuable minerals that the team needed for their day to day lives. Their trip to New 'Lantis had emptied the lower portions of the still that had still remained flooded and had given Rodney an excuse to go through every nook and cranny. One of the things that they had already discovered was an ancient manufacturing lab where raw minerals of any kind were processed into whatever was needed.

Teyla shook her head as she ran through the might city. The woman's last words echoing in her mind- they had not been in the dream but Teyla still heard them as though the woman was before her and speaking.

_I shall give you a mighty gift, like the ones your ancestors have given you only stronger, better, more refined._

She didn't know what to make of the old woman and her promise of a mighty gift. The mission had been a week previous and so far Teyla had experienced nothing of a mighty gift. Through she had felt the early stirrings of a child within her. Teyla knew that the babe had not been conceived through any man she knew and for that reason she was reluctant to go see Dr. Keller.

'I cannot let my friends know about this…' Teyla thought as she ran, following the same course around the city. '…if they were to know, they might-'

Teyla suddenly stopped, the ice-cold knot that signalled the presence of a wraith growing within her. Trying to figure out where the feeling was coming from her vision went dark and she saw events unfolding within her mind.

oOo

"Alright." John began as he took control of the morning briefing once more. "Are we ready to begin?"

"No." Rodney stated with a roll of his eyes. "Teyla's not here."

"Hmm, that's odd." Ronan muttered causing the eyes of the senior staff to go to him. "I passed her running this morning."

John said nothing he merely tapped his ear-radio. "Chuck?"

'Yes Colonel.' Chuck replied, his voice smiling through the phone. 'What can I do for you on this fine Atlantean morning?'

"Can you do a sweep of the city, see if there are any people in the far reaches of the piers that shouldn't be there…?"

"Sure thing…"

They all waited anxiously while Chuck did his sweep and when he radioed John back that they had found someone unmoving on the north pier they all jumped into action. In the control room Chuck explained that the energy signal matched one of their own people, and yet it was tainted as though an alien life form had attached itself to it.

Both worried and concerned, John sent a team of marines along with Dr. Keller and a couple nurses to the area. He, Ronan and Rodney waited with baited breath until Dr. Keller radioed them. What she told them had all three of them sprinting for the infirmary.

oOo

"What do you mean she's pregnant with a wraith baby?" Rodney asked, his voice rising in panic. "How can she be pregnant with a wraith baby?"

"I don't know." Dr. Keller sighed, answering Rodney's question for what felt like the hundredth time. "All I know is that when I scanned her, I found a large concentration of Wraith DNA growing in her womb."

"It has to be from Michael." John stated quietly, well aware that Ronan's eyes were shooting daggers at him. "He had her in his lab for a good twenty minutes. He could have done something to her in that time…"

"Well I can tell you that this is more than likely an experiment of some kind." Dr. Keller added watching Ronan's face carefully. The Staetan was on the verge of going on a rampage and although it had not been said, she had to clear the air where Teyla was concerned. "I found some scar tissue. I think Michael must have injected a very sharp needle into her womb."

"And now she's pregnant with a wraith baby." Rodney muttered not believing it.

"Yes we're all aware of that Rodney." John snapped before turning to Dr. Keller. "What are our options?"

"Well normally-"

"NO!"

They all turned towards the scream. There was Teyla sitting straight up in the infirmary bed, her reddish-brown hair matted with sweat and her breathing ragged. Dr. Keller, John, Rodney and Ronan were all instantly at her side. Teyla seemed to be in a daze; her eyes were staring ahead and were not focussing on anyone. Dr. Keller tried to get a response from her but nothing was working.

"I'm sorry." Dr. Keller apologized, turning to Teyla's friends. "I don't know what to do…"

"I see…" Teyla choked out, coming out of her trance. "…I see…"

"What do you see Teyla?" Ronan asked, leaning in closer than the rest. "What do you see?"

"I see a gate…" Teyla muttered as though she was in pain. "…there is a gate in Atlantis and it's not round and it travels to somewhere else…"

"I think she's talking nonsense…" Dr. Keller stated as she motioned a watching nurse to inject Teyla with a sedative but John held out his arm to stop him.

"A traveller is coming." Teyla muttered as her eyes began to close. "A traveller…"

oOo

"Do you have any idea what she's talking about McKay?" John asked once Dr. Jennifer Keller and Rona had settled Teyla down. "This 'gate' that's not a gate…"

"I have no idea." Rodney answered honestly. "But I'll see what I can dig up."

* * *

A/N- Hello my beloved readers. Sorry for the delay- I've kinda lost all interest in Sparky and SGA but thanks to dear Anuna and were wondeful vid 'Book of Love' I muscled up enough inspiration to write this chapter. I know it's short but it's the best I could do. Hopefully the next chapter will be out in a week or so... please leave a review. And thank you to Anuna, Nora and ArafelSedai and HoplesslyEscaflowne for reviewing chapter 6 and thank you to Whirlwind-2005 for reviewing chapter 1. And no Whirlwind, Elizabeth ascending is NOT a spoiler. Just a plot device in my story. 


	8. Dissapearing Act

**Chapter 8: Disappearing Act **

She was dozing in the infirmary and was healing splendidly as far as Dr. Jennifer Keller was concerned. John watched her sleeping form waiting for the right moment to wake her- it was then that he watched her stir awake and he approached the bed.

"Um, Elizabeth?"

She opened her eyes and saw John standing over her. He was all geared up and ready to explore the lower sections of the city that were no longer flooded with Rodney. They were searching for the 'gate that was not a gate' and Elizabeth was glad that he came by the infirmary to see her.

"Hello John-" She answered warmly looking into John's eyes.

"How are you doing?"

"Oh, alright I guess-" Elizabeth answered with a small chuckle as she let her gaze fall to her hands. "-I was just dozing, mentally reviewing the past couple months…."

"They've been rough-" John interjected, noticing that Elizabeth had trailed off. "-it's odd to see different stars at night."

"Oh-?" Elizabeth asked, gazing back up at John as she leaned against her pillow

"…yeah," John answered his gaze on Elizabeth. "-I was running with Ronan along the northern pier last night and it kinda hit me all of a sudden."

"Are the stars nice?" Elizabeth asked, slightly bitter that she was still stuck in the infirmary.

"Oh yeah." John insisted. "They're nice. Though I think the change is hard on everyone. Even the ocean doesn't sound the same."

"The last few weeks have been hard on everyone…" Elizabeth whispered, knowing what John was talking about. She knew the burden that he was carrying seeing how Jennifer Keller practically refused anything Atlantis related to pass her way.

_ "Sheppard where are you?" _

"I'm here Rodney-" John answered the jarring voice in his head with some anger in his voice. "-what can I do for you?"

_"You were supposed to meet me in the lower parts of the city almost half and hour ago…"_

"I'll be right there Rodney…." John sighed and turned off his radio. "-I promised Rodney that Ronan and I would explore some sections of the lower city today, you know the parts that were flooded but cleared by our little hyperspace flight…?"

"Right," Elizabeth nodded with a small smile as she brushed a curl out of her eye. "-go help Rodney. Maybe the three of you will find this 'gate that's not a gate' that Teyla was talking about…"

"Maybe."

"How is she anyway?" Elizabeth asked, reluctant to let John go. "I'm still bedridden and Teyla is staying isolated…."

"She's been unconscious most of the time." John replied worriedly. "The wraith DNA is multiplying faster than Dr. Keller thought. Pretty soon she'll start to show…"

"Poor girl…." Elizabeth murmured.

'_Sheppard!'_ Rodney snapped through the radio. _'Where are you?' _

"Okay…" John answered with a sigh as he decided to ignore Rodney's ranting. He turned to leave and when he was at the doors to the control room he stopped, turned around and spoke again. "…see you soon…"

"Alright John," Elizabeth thanked sincerely watching with a fluttering heart as he left. "See you soon."

oOo

John was tiring of Rodney's muttering. They had been in the lab for several hours and both he and Ronan were about ready to pack up and leave. Except that Rodney wouldn't let them. He pulled out the argument that if this device was a weapon both of them should be there. John sighed and looked at the device. It was a triangular enclave about eight feet tall and about two feet wide at the base.

Beside it was an Atlantean control panel that Rodney was furiously trying to get working. They had only been walking through the lower portions of the city for twenty minutes before they had stumbled across this room and ever since then Rodney was furiously trying to figure out what the triangular device was.

"McKay!" John yelled, trying to convince Rodney that it was finally time to go.

"Ten more minutes Sheppard!" Rodney yelled back, not looking up from his position. "Give me ten more minutes."

"I'll hold you to that." John promised.

"I'll hold you to that too." Ronan agreed.

"Excellent." Rodney stated sarcastically as he continued to press buttons- no longer paying real attention. "You military guys do not understand the concept of science-"

"Uh- McKay?" John began; watching as the panel lit up behind Rodney who had just turned around.

"I mean, science has saved your behinds more times than-"

"McKay." Ronan interjected trying to get Rodney's attention as the triangular device lit up as well and a green shimmering curtain, much like the event horizon of the Stargate appeared within the borders of the triangle.

"Well, I can't count how many times, but I know that it's a lot and-"

"RODNEY!" John yelled, finally catching the scientists' attention.

"What?" Rodney asked exasperated with John.

"You got it working." John explained pointing to the device.

"I did?" Rodney asked as he turned around and saw that he had indeed got the device working. "I did! Great!" He tapped his comm. and got in touch with Elizabeth. "Rodney to Elizabeth."

"Dr. Weir cannot be answering calls dealing with Atlantis." Jennifer Keller answered instead of Elizabeth's voice. "I'm sorry Dr. McKay but she-"

"Please Dr. Keller," Rodney pleaded while rolling his eyes. "-this is important. And it's not as though I can take it to Sheppard because he's right here with me."

"I'm here Rodney," Came Elizabeth's voice in Rodney's ear. "What do you have for us?"

"Well," Rodney began, looking at the reading on his laptop that was attached to the ancient Atlantean control panel. "What ever it is that we've got here, I have it working."

"Is that wise?" Elizabeth asked concerned as she walked forward in the control room. "Turning something on with out knowing what it is first?"

"I'm sure it is." Rodney comforted his voice sounding small and far away in Elizabeth's ear. "I couldn't get the control panel to work with out turning on the device it seems, and I doubt that the ancients would create something dangerous with out leaving a warning."

"If you say so." Elizabeth muttered thinking back to the nanites that had killed several of her team in their first year inhabiting Atlantis.

"Dr. Weir, we're reading massive energy output from Rodney's location." A technician informed jumping onto the open channel, causing Elizabeth's heart to jump and beat a little faster.

"Rodney," She began "Did you hear that?"

"Yes, yes. We're not in any danger Elizabeth-"

"If you say so." Elizabeth muttered again.

"I say so." Rodney affirmed. "I'll contact you once I learn something about this device, Rodney out."

"Is it safe for Dr. McKay to be tampering with instruments that he doesn't know anything about?" Jennifer Keller asked as she still stood at Elizabeth's side.

"He says that it's safe." Elizabeth pointed out with a sigh. "And I have no reason to doubt-"

"Dr. Weir." The technician interrupted, causing Elizabeth to clutch her radio ear-piece in horror. "I'm reading a massive power spike coming from where Dr. McKay is."

"What?"

"And the power's rising."

"John, Rodney, Ronan you have got to get out of there." Elizabeth ordered but all she got was static. "John? John do you copy?"

Again she was met with static only, and Elizabeth took one glance at Dr. Keller who was already getting a nurse and a wheelchair for Elizabeth. "Major Lorne?" Elizabeth radioed as she waited for her mode of transportation to arrive.

_'Yes ma'am?'_ Evan Lorne replied his voice sounding tiny over the radio. _'What can I do for you?'_

"I need you to get a team and go to Colonel Sheppard's last location."

That was all the explanation that she needed to give Lorne. And as Dr. Jennifer Keller brought Elizabeth her wheelchair she mentally braced herself for the weight of command again.

* * *

A/N- Hello my beloved readers. I got a little sidetracked with my original stories and I forgot about this! -shakes head- but it's up now. I hope you all liked this chapter and let me tell you that this is part of my own little plot that I started LAST summer but never finished. I'm inserting it into this story and I hope that you guys think that it fits with the feel of season 4 that I am trying to create:D Lemme tell you, this is going to create GREAT angst for our dear Lizzie and Shep. Thank you to HopelesslyEscaflowne and dear Anuna for reading this chapter. :D And do check out Anuna and my Atlantis AU under the name 2TreeHuggers. Link is on my bio. The next chapter should be up next Thursday. Please read and review!

A/N2- Just fixed something up...


	9. Realities Away I

**Chapter 9: Realities Away I**

While Elizabeth was being wheeled to the control room, Major Lorne and his men were making their way to Ronan, Rodney and John's last known location- they themselves found that they were back in the Atlantean lab that was quickly filling up with water.

Panic gripped Rodney when he couldn't feel the floor beneath his feet and it only subsided once John helped him to the wall, where there was a fallen beam that he could cling onto.

"Rodney!" John asked, panicked as well. "What happened?"

"I don't know!" Rodney admitted with despair as he clutched onto the fallen beam with all his might.

"How can you not know?" John asked, frustration and fury pushing the panic aside.

"I just don't!"

"This is great." Ronan muttered as he joined Rodney and John on the wall.

"I know, I know." Rodney agreed furiously. "I will fix this."

"No," John countered shaking his head. "Elizabeth will help us- if the radio's not broken." He tapped the communication device in his ear and spoke into it. "Elizabeth, this is Sheppard- do you read me?" There was static, which caused the panic to rise up in John a little bit but he took a breath and continued again. "Elizabeth." He repeated, "This is John. Do you-" There was more static and a voice rang out in his ear.

"John?" Elizabeth's voice asked astonishment and shock clearly evident in her voice.

"Yeah, listen. Rodney-"

"Rodney's there too?" Elizabeth interrupted, her voice breaking slightly causing John to wonder how long they had been gone.

"Of course I am Elizabeth." Rodney interjected, after listening in on the conversation and realising that once again, he would have to tell them what to do. "Listen, the room that we are in is flooded, can you see if Zelenka can remotely open the doors of the lab that we are in."

"Of, of course." Came Elizabeth's shaky reply.

Within moments, the doors opened and the water rushed out taking Ronan, Rodney and John with it. They all landed hard in the hall and took a few moments to internally check for any broken bones.

"You two alright?" John asked getting to his feet, watching Ronan and Rodney do the same.

"Yes."

"Uh- yeah." Rodney agreed. "It would seem like I am."

"Good, now." He tapped his communication device and contacted Elizabeth again.

"Listen Elizabeth, I don't know what happened- but we'll be making our way to the city now."

"Of course." Elizabeth replied again, her voice still sounding shaky. "But I want Carson to check you out first. Alright?"

'Carson?'

The thought rang like a warning bell in their heads and both John and Rodney looked at each other and then at Ronan who merely shrugged his shoulders. Suddenly Rodney's eyes lit up and he mouthed 'Alternate Reality' to John. John just glowered at Rodney for his stupidity.

"John?" Elizabeth's voice broke though their silent communication and forced them both back into reality. "John are you okay?"

"We're fine Elizabeth." John stated as they started walking towards the city. "Does Carson really have to check us out?"

"Yes." She replied sternly and John could almost she her clasp her hands together. "He does. Weir out."

oOo

"Did I hear right lass?" Carson asked as he stepped up beside Elizabeth who was standing in the centre of the control room. "John and Rodney are back?"

"Yes." She replied, her breath quickening as she answered her CMO. "They are back Carson. They're back in Atlantis. Please, gather your medical team and meet up with them Make sure that the two of them are alright and bring them to the briefing room when you are done."

"Aye lass." Carson nodded; knowing what she was feeling as he quickly left the control room. Elizabeth watched him go and tried to breathe. They were back.

Meanwhile, still in the bowels of Atlantis; John, Rodney and Ronan were still walking towards the main part of the city.

"So what do you mean we're in an alternate reality?" Ronan asked shaking his head in confusion. "How could we be in another reality?"

"Like I've said," Rodney began with a tone of annoyance in his voice. "-it must have been -"

"Good god lads," Came the voice of Carson as he rounded a corner with several medical personal behind him- one being a nurse who bore a striking similarity to Dr. Jennifer Keller. "-I don't know what you think that you've been doing but-"

Carson paused at the gasps from the men in front of him. It was then he saw that while Rodney and John were alright, there was a third man with them. He saw that Ronan- the runner that they had encountered nearly two years ago was with them. As he looked at the three men, all of whom were sporting shocked faces- he saw that something was amiss. He scrutinized John and Rodney and just knew that something was off about them. He couldn't tell what it was, so he kept his doubts to himself and then just continued on speaking.

"-as I was saying Elizabeth wants to make sure that you lads are alright. After all you've been gone for-"

"Carson?" Rodney asked, stepping forward, amazed that he was seeing his best-friend before him. "Is that really you?"

"Of course it's me lad." Carson answered, his tone suggesting that Rodney was mad. "Who else would I be?"

"Oh I knew it..." Rodney muttered as he put his head in his hands.

"...knew what?" Carson asked looking from John to Rodney to Ronan. "What did you know Rodney?"

oOo

Meanwhile back on their Atlantis, Elizabeth was wringing her hands as she sat in the control room. She knew full well that Major Lorne and his men would be reaching the lab in a matter of moments but she could not wait any longer. Frantic to get some answers she tapped her radio ear-piece and spoke.

"Major Lorne?" She asked, crossing her fingers as she hoped desperately for news, any news.

"We've just reached the lab ma'am." Major Lorne answered and after a moment of silence Elizabeth could hear Lorne's sharp intake of breath and she knew that something wasn't right.

"What is it?" Elizabeth asked worriedly as she stared ahead, trying to picture in her mind's eye what Major Lorne was seeing. "What did you find?"

"Nothing..." Major Lorne replied softly.

"What?" Elizabeth asked with horror. "How can there be nothing there? They have to be there. Even if they had-" Elizabeth paused not wanting to say what she had been thinking all along.

'Even if they had died their bodies would still be there.'

She shook the thought away and continued. "They have to be there."

"I know ma'am-" Major Lorne agreed his voice unusually quiet. "But they are gone."

"How can they just be gone?" Elizabeth asked, her mind trying to grasp the situation. "They couldn't have just disappeared into thin air- could they?"

"I know that Dr. Weir." Major Lorne answered sympathetically. "But where else could they have gone?"

"I don't know..." Elizabeth admitted shaking her head as she rubbed her weary eyes. It was in that moment that a though struck her. "Major Lorne, is there a device in that room still?"

"Yes." Major Lorne confirmed. "There is a large triangle- it almost looks like a gate- and it has a control panel next to it."

'A gate that is not a gate.' Elizabeth thought to herself in wonder before she spoke. "Is the control panel on? Is it displaying writing?"

"Yes." Major Lorne confirmed as he stood in front of the display screen of Rodney's laptop. "But it's in a dialect of Ancient that I don't know."

"I'm on my way." Elizabeth answered. "Major Lorne, stay where you are I'm on my way." Elizabeth paused and looked to her left where she saw Radek standing nervously. "Radek-?"

"Yes?" Radek asked as he jumped to attention. He had been silent throughout the entire exchange but Elizabeth could see that we was willing and eager to help.

"Come with me."

* * *

A/N- THANK YOU TO 'HopelesslyEscaflowne' for reviewing. I said that I wouldn't put up this chapter till someone reviewed and someone did. :D I hope that the rest of you, beloved readers liked this chapter and will review this one too. Depending on the reviews, you could see a new chapter as soon as tomorrow... 


	10. Realities Away II

**Chapter 10: Realities Away II**

"What do you mean you're from an alternate reality?" Elizabeth asked as they were all seated around the briefing table. "How is that even possible?"

"I don't know." Rodney answered with a sigh as he sat in his usual seat. "But it's true. I'm not your Rodney and John isn't your John. This isn't our reality."

"How can you tell?" Carson asked, causing the eyes of the three men to fall on him.

"In our reality you died a couple months ago Carson." Rodney answered with a heavy heart.

"I died?" Carson asked, not believing what he was hearing. "In what? A Wraith Attack? An Asuran Attack?"

"An exploding tumour actually..." John answered with a shrug of his shoulders.

"An exploding tumour?" Carson asked in shock, not believing the manner that he had gone out. "But that's impossible. I extracted the tumour and gave right to the bomb-squad trained marine who was right there. The tumour exploded in a safety container."

"Well in our reality you didn't want to put anyone else at risk." Rodney answered. "And you died."

"The patient-?" Carson asked but he was cut off by Elizabeth.

"Rodney, John- you're here now. How do you know that this isn't your reality?"

"Elizabeth," Rodney began again, his tone taking on a frustrated edge. "I've already told you-"

"That device in the lab-" Elizabeth murmured, interrupting Rodney's ramble. "-it must have been a quantum mirror."

"A what?" Ronan asked.

"A quantum mirror..." Rodney answered, his mind beginning to put two and two together. "...of course. Only, it wasn't like the quantum mirror that the SGC found. This one was a full blown triangle and-"

"-and was the 'gate that is not a gate' I'm betting." John interrupted looking up from the table to stare at the people before him.

His Rodney and Ronan looked worried but the same, Carson- whom John knew wasn't his Carson- looked slightly confused but when his eyes fell upon Elizabeth he was shocked at what he saw. Her hair was tied up in a ponytail that fell to the middle of her back with wisps flying out to frame her hazel eyes. Their eyes met and John could see a pained look in them and he wondered what she had gone through since her John had disappeared.

"Gate that is not a gate?" She asked, breaking the gaze. "Colonel, what are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about what Teyla said." John answered noticing that at the mention of Teyla's name Elizabeth's eyes shot up.

"She's alive?"

"She didn't get kidnapped by Michael?" Carson asked, glancing to Elizabeth.

Ronan, John and Rodney just stayed silent- clearly there were many, many things different about the reality that they inhabited.

oOo

Meanwhile in their reality, Elizabeth had just made the most amazing discovery in relation to the device. She rubbed her hands over her eyes in amazement and re-read a portion of the log again to make sure that she had the translation right. She did, and she knew that finding her team would be almost an insurmountable task.

"This is incredible." She whispered leaning back in her seat.

"What is?" Major Lorne asked coming over to Elizabeth to peer over her shoulder.

"This device- it allows someone to interact with alternate universes."

"Really?" Zelenka asked looking up from his diagnosis of the triangle to the small metallic bracelet in Elizabeth's hands.

"Alternate Realities?" Major Lorne asked again. "Are you sure?"

"Yes." Elizabeth confirmed with a nod of her head. "Apparently, the ancient who created this was called Theliza and she lost her husband N'joh very early on in the war against the wraith. She was heartbroken and she committed herself to this project-" Elizabeth paused to look at the magnificent triangle. "She created this quantum gate as she called it, to see what else she could have done."

"And, she got this device to work?" Major Lorne asked once more, both intrigued and slightly frightened at the possibility of the power of the device.

"Yes," Elizabeth affirmed, nodding her head again. "She saw many alternate realities, some good- but many bad...many more bad..."

"So, Ronan, Colonel Sheppard and Rodney are in an alternate universe?"

"Apparently." Zelenka stated, slightly shocked as well as he met Major Lorne's worried gaze.

oOo

"Back to this gate thing," Elizabeth sated trying not to think about how different the Rodney and John were as they sat across from her. "You say that it is like the one the SGC found?"

"Yes." Rodney affirmed. "Only what we came through was obviously much more ancient."

"I don't understand." Carson stated with a shrug.

"The SGC theorised after they had destroyed the mirror that it must have been built by the ancients." Rodney explained as he leaned forward on the table. "I would say that we just proved their theory."

"I guess." Elizabeth whispered looking stunned as she sank back into her chair. Her hands shifted positions and John could see that there was an engagement ring on her left hand. "I guess you're not our Rodney or my- our John at all, are you."

"No." John answered sympathetically, though he couldn't take his eyes off the ring. "Elizabeth- are you and Simon engaged in this reality?"

"Simon?" Elizabeth asked in shock, her head shooting up to look John right in the eyes. In them she saw confusion and when her own eyes fell upon the simple gold and diamond engagement ring she realised with a pained heart what he meant. "No, Simon and I broke up after the siege of Atlantis. When we all travelled back to Earth."

"Then who are you engaged too?" John asked confused and it wasn't until he saw the tears brimming in her eyes that his question was answered.

Elizabeth could see that his question had been answered but she felt the need to say it anyways. "You John-" She whispered quietly. "I'm engaged to you."

oOo

Meanwhile, back in their own reality Elizabeth muttered to herself as she continued to read the ancient log. "Oh No."

"What is it?" Major Lorne asked joining the group by the control panel. "What's wrong?"

"This could be a problem." Elizabeth muttered, staring at the ancient symbols.

"What?" Major Lorne asked insistently and she watched as Elizabeth pulled a device off the control panel and held it gingerly in her hands.

"Is that what I think that is?" Zelenka asked, taking a closer look at the triangular device.

"What is it?" Major Lorne asked again.

"This is the control device that will allow them to come home to our reality." Elizabeth whispered, her heart sinking.

"But they do not have it." Major Lorne stated, not believing what she was hearing.

"I know." Elizabeth agreed as she closed her eyes for a moment before opening them again. "This means that we will have to go after them..."

"You're talking about an awfully small needle in an awful large haystack ma'am." Major Lorne pointed out.

"I know." Elizabeth confirmed. "But we can mount a rescue mission."

"Do we even know how to turn the device on?" Major Lorne asked, his need to do something growing stronger.

"Yes." Zelenka confirmed looking over Elizabeth's shoulder. "It needs to be activated by someone with the ATA gene."

The lab fell silent as all eyes fell to Major Lorne, who just realised what was going to happen. "When do you want me to leave?"

* * *

A/N- Hello beloved readers. Seeing on how i'm going away for the next six days I figured that I'd update this little gem one last time before I leave. Thank you to HeartyJessica, Serised, lemons and wraith oh my and Gingercake for reviewing the last chapte.r Ginger- I'm sorry for 'stealing' your idea, I myself borrowed it from one of the season four speculation threads that I came across and lemos- I know threatening my readers is never good but hey it worked didn't it? ;) Oh and readers, please take the time to review this chapter cause I would love to see the review count over 40 by the time I get home. :D Ta ta for now beloved readers, have a good labour day weekend! 


	11. Travellers I

**Chapter 11: Travellers**

"What?" Rodney asked in shock looking from Elizabeth to John- his mind trying to comprehend that in an alternate reality that they could be together.

"What?" Echoed John, just as shocked as Rodney was.

"It's true." Carson explained, looking from Rodney to John. "You, well, our Colonel Sheppard proposed to Elizabeth right before he and Rodney were captured by Kolya and his men."

"You mean when he fed me to that Wraith?" John asked, shuddering inwardly at the memory.

"That happened to you too?" Carson asked looking to John. "How did you survive?"

"The Wraith have the ability to give life back." John answered simply as he ran over what happened in his reality between that time and the present. "But forget about that- what did you guys do when the ancients took over Atlantis again?"

"Or how about when our sun when super flare on us?" Rodney added.

"And what about our game?" John asked, wincing slightly at the memory. "That was between Rodney and I and-"

"And how about when we stumbled upon the ark?" Ronan supplemented as he spoke up.

"And then there was the ancient drilling station." Rodney pointed out. "And the whole thing with Michael- you already said that that happened-"

"And what about the Asurans attacking Atlantis?" John asked, causing Rodney to nod in agreement.

"How did you guys get to another planet without me or Sheppard?"

"Hardly any of what you pointed out happened here." Elizabeth answered, clearly still upset. "The super flare did happen and we survived by deflecting it. The game that our Rodney and John were playing was turned off, and we know nothing about an ark; or about an ancient drilling station and certainly nothing about the Asurans attacking Atlantis or the Ancients coming back."

"Guess when they say alternate realities they mean it." John muttered, catching Elizabeth's eye.

oOo

Back in their own reality, Major Lorne was ready.

"Now Zelenka, you're sure that I want to go through this thing?" He asked pointing towards the 'gate that was not a gate'.

"Major Lorne- I am sure that it is perfectly safe." Zelenka stated certainly for what felt like the hundredth time.

"Perfectly safe wasn't what I was hoping for." Major Lorne admitted with a roll of his eyes. "Totally safe now..."

"...never mind that." Elizabeth chastised eager for Major Lorne, Lt. Cadman and two other Marines to go through the 'quantum gate'. "Zelenka, what was it that you wanted to tell Lorne?"

"Ah right. Now, if you run into yourselves in these alternate realities get out as quick as you can."

"Why?" Laura asked with curiosity. All eyes fell upon her and Elizabeth could clearly see that although she and Carson had been broken up for months before his death- the young Lieutenant clearly still cared a lot for the former CMO of Atlantis.

"Entropic Cascade Failure-" Zelenka answered simply. "It is what happens when there are two of you in one reality. 'Rod' didn't experience it because- well he punched through into our reality. This is direct travelling. So be wary. It is a very harmful and very painful experience. Not to mention life threatening."

"I understand." Major Lorne answered with all the stoicism of a soldier.

"Now from what I can decipher, this creates a link to you and your reality-" Elizabeth began as she attached the bracelet to Major Lorne. He winced in pain and Elizabeth winced internally as well. "Sorry." She apologised as Lorne took his hand back. "Now, that dial in the centre allows you to travel through the alternate realities. Do you see where it is now?"

"Yes." Major Lorne answered, the dial was directly at twelve o'clock.

"Well that is our reality." Elizabeth answered. "When you're ready to come home, replace the dial there and step through the gate."

"I guess then we're ready to move out." Major Lorne answered as he moved the dial one click to his right. The quantum gate sprung to life and began to build up a charge.

"Oh and one more thing-" Zelenka began as a bright light enveloped the room. "-dial sequentially."

The room was empty.

"I hope they heard that."

"Why ?" Elizabeth asked, looking up from her wheelchair.

"Well by moving it sequentially and slowly they have a better chance of finding them."

"Then I hope that they heard that." Elizabeth agreed looking towards the gate.

'Please let Evan have heard that...'

oOo

For Major Lorne and his team, when the temporary blindness of the flash of light diminished, all they could see was darkness. No lights came from anywhere and the air was dank and cold and smelt like death.

"I can't see anything." Lorne stated frustratedly.

"Here's some lights sir." Laura stated as she turned on the flashlight and scoured it around the room.

"Nothing but dead bodies..." Lorne stated as he surveyed the death and destruction before them. None of the bodies wore Atlantean uniforms and Lorne breathed a sigh of relief that he wouldn't have to stare down upon any of his friends- despite the fact that he was in another universe all together. "Any life signs?

"No sir." Answered a marine with a life-signs detector. "Just us."

"Maybe we should look around?" Laura suggested.

"No. If they were here, we'd know it."

With a heavy sigh, Lorne turned back to the quantum gate and turned the dial one more notch to the right. It barely moved and he wondered briefly how long it would take to explore all the alternate realities.

'It could be forever.' He thought futilely as the white light engulfed them. 'We could never find them..."

oOo

When the light subsided they found themselves in a perfectly lit Atlantean lab and Lorne smiled to himself. All seemed normal and there didn't seem to be anyone in sight.

"Well this is better." Lorne murmured as he took a step forward but as soon as he did he was surrounded by about a dozen marines. "Or not. Listen, we come in peace." He held his hands up to show that he was peaceful, but the marines before him didn't want to move- until a voice broke through the crowd.

"Wait-" The voice seemed close, and then the person speaking broke through the line of marines. "Major Lorne?"

"Rodney?" Laura asked stepping beside her team leader.

"Laura?" Rodney asked in shock as his eyes went to Cadman. "You're here?"

"Yes." She stated with a smile thinking that the Rodney before her was the Rodney from their reality. "Why wouldn't I be here?"

"Well for one thing you're dead-"

"Rodney," Lorne interrupted, looking at his friend. "We're from an alternate reality."

"Really?" Rodney asked tearing his guilt-ridden gaze from Laura to Lorne "How is that even possible?"

"This device-" Laura answered indicating behind her. "-it's a quantum gate. Like a quantum mirror."

"I always suspected-"

"Listen-"Lorne interrupted, knowing that Rodney would prattle on all day if he didn't stop the scientist right away. "I gather that our Colonel Sheppard, Ronan and our Rodney haven't come by here have they?" When Rodney merely shook his head, Lorne sighed. "Then we've got to be going..."

"Wait-"Rodney began as Lorne moved the dial one more notch to the right.

"I'm sorry Rodney, we have to go and find our people." Lorne stated and as the white light engulfed him he could hear Rodney's last words.

_I understand._

* * *

A/N- Hey guys. Thank you to those who reviewed the last chapter, I hope that you will review this one too. :D


	12. Travellers II

**Chapter 12: Travellers II **

Back in their new reality, Elizabeth was walking John through the corridors of Atlantis. They seemed much fuller then he remembered and he wondered just how many refugees the Elizabeth before him had taken in.

"We thought, well hoped really, that you two might be alive still. Despite the fact that Kolya's base was attacked by the Wraith" Elizabeth began slowly, not meeting his eyes.

"Well, Rodney was telling me that when Dr. Carter came through to the SGC from an alternate reality she felt the effects of having two Carter's in a single reality right away." John answered, still trying to grasp the fact that he wasn't in his home- even though it looked like his home.

"Yes," Elizabeth answered with a nod. "Something like that happened in our SGC as well."

"So there might be a chance that your John is still alive." He pointed out optimistically, knowing that the woman before him wasn't the same Elizabeth that he knew. The woman before him was not a leader- but a fiancée mourning the loss of her beloved.

"Maybe..."

"This must be really hard for you." John stated after a moment of silence

"Oh John you have no idea..." Elizabeth began her voice trailing off. He could see that there were tears in her eyes and he wished that she could be as strong as his Elizabeth.

"...Sorry." Rodney interrupted as they rounded a corner. "But John, we need to get back down to that lab."

"Why?" Elizabeth asked looking up- the tears suddenly gone.

"Well Ronan just experienced a flash of 'entropic cascade failure." Rodney answered, his voice bordering on panic. "That means that his double in this reality is still here."

"And what about ours?" Elizabeth asked hopefully. "Are our John and our Rodney here in our reality somewhere?"

"Well I think that it must have something to do with proximity, but I don't really want to find out-" Rodney answered sarcastically as he looked towards John. "-do you?"

"No." John answered honestly shaking his head. "I'm sorry Dr. Weir---- Elizabeth---- but the sooner we're out of here the better."

"I understand." Elizabeth answered with a small nod. "This isn't your home."

"No." Rodney agreed. "It's not."

"I'll give you all the help you can want."

"Thank you Elizabeth." John thanked as he followed Rodney to the lab in the bowls of the city.

'And I can only hope-' Elizabeth wished silently as the two of them wandered out of sight. '-I can only hope that our Rodney and my beloved John is still out there somewhere. And while I'm sure it will cause you pain, I hope that I find out.'

oOo

"Relax." Zelenka ordered as he watched Elizabeth wring her hands in frustration.

"How can I relax when my people are out there in an alternate reality!?" She snapped angrily. "How can I possibly relax when every bone in my body wishes that I was out there with Major Lorne and his team looking for them...?" Elizabeth sighed and rubbed her forehead. "I don't do well with waiting."

oOo

"Major Lorne?" John asked as Lorne and his team stepped through into another reality.

"Colonel?" Lorne asked tentatively as he took a step forward.

"No Major." John answered and Lorne simply sighed.

"Okay, this isn't our reality either."

"What?" John asked but Lorne had already turned the dial again.

"We're searching for our people." He answered as a white light began to fill the room. "Their missing..."

'And hopefully we will find them.' He added to himself silently.

oOo

"Well this is getting tiring." Laura stated with a sigh as they appeared in yet another lab. It looked the same as all the others- and it was hard to tell if they were in their own reality or not. Though Lorne did know the difference.

"I wish that we could find them." He stated with a sigh when suddenly water began to rush in. "Oh no-"

oOo

Elizabeth paced around her office, knowing full well that Carson was looking on with worry and concern in his eyes.

"Lass you're just going to have to face facts," He began but Elizabeth cut him off.

"I don't want to face facts Carson." She snapped still pacing. "I can't face facts..."

"They may be dead in this reality." Carson stated bluntly causing Elizabeth to wince.

"Maybe not-" She argued, holding on to all her hope. "Rodney said-"

"Rodney has been wrong before." Carson pointed out and Elizabeth had to agree with that statement at least. " Elizabeth-" Carson began again but Elizabeth merely shook her head.

"No!" She exclaimed as she whirled to face Carson dead on. "I refuse to believe that my fiancée is dead. I refuse to believe it!"

oOo

Meanwhile, a flash of white light let Lorne and his team into another reality.

"I guess the expedition never arrived in that reality." He murmured to himself not noticing the people around him

"Major Lorne?"

"Dr. Weir?" Lorne asked, noticing that Elizabeth was standing on her own two legs and her hair was cropped short to her head.

"I don't think that this is our reality sir." Laura whispered and Lorne was inclined to agree.

"Ma'am, have you seen Ronan, Rodney or Colonel Sheppard recently?" He asked, hoping that maybe their people were in this reality.

"Colonel Sheppard is dead." Elizabeth answered with remorse in her voice. "He along with the rest of his team died at Michael's hands."

"Oh well, that didn't happen to our men." Lorne stated with a sigh of his own.

"Then they are not here." Elizabeth answered coldly with a shake of her head.

"Then we'll just leave." Lorne suggested as he turned the dial one more notch to the right- horrified to see that they hadn't even come close to the one o'clock position yet.

"Major," Elizabeth began her voice softer. "I'm sorry."

"So am I ma'am."

And with that, they were gone.

oOo

Elizabeth couldn't stand it. Not only couldn't she go out into the vast alternate realities to find her people- she couldn't even pace. Instead she made do with rolling her wheelchair from one end to the lab to another and Zelenka felt as though he had to say something, anything to keep her calm.

"For what it's worth..." He began shakily, pausing as Elizabeth turned towards him with a stone face. "I'm sure that they're alright."

oOo

"I thought I might find you out here." John whispered as he stepped onto the balcony of Atlantis. It was night, and he was surprised to see that the stars were the same as he remembered. Clearly this Atlantis was still on 'Old Lantia' and that thought comforted him slightly.

"How are the repairs going?" Elizabeth asked softly, not tearing her gaze away from the ocean. "I heard that Rodney just got the lab cleaned up so can I assume that things aren't going well?"

"You can assume that." John agreed as he leaned onto the railing of the balcony. "Poor Rodney, he's trying to fix the damaged circuits but he doesn't really know what he's doing."

"When does he ever...?" Elizabeth asked with a small sigh, letting silence descend upon them.

John broke the silence first. "...listen, I'm sorry."

Elizabeth turned to look at him and was shocked by what she saw- for a moment she saw a flicker of her John inside this stranger before her. And she struggled to hold on to her emotions.

'How can this be so hard?' She thought painfully to herself. 'When I know that he isn't mine...'

* * *

A/N- Hello beloved readers. Here's a present for you all. Thank you to Gingercake and dear Anuna for reviewing the last chapter. I hope that the two of you (and more) will review this chapter and if I get over 45 reviews I'll post the next chapter ASAP (maybe even as soon as tomorrow) grins 


	13. Don't Lose Hope

**Chapter 13: Don't Lose Hope **

Major Lorne and his team stepped into another reality to find several air force personal staring them down.

"Colonel Caldwell..." Lorne greeted, trying to be as nonchalant as possible

"Major Lorne, what are you doing here?" Caldwell asked glaring Lorne down.

"Just completing my mission sir..." Lorne answered with a small smile. "You see we're from another reality and-"

"An alternate what?"

"An alternate reality and we're searching for our people." Lorne answered simply, hoping that the Colonel before him would leave it at that. Caldwell merely stared at Lorne and he knew that he would have to continue. "We're looking for Dr. Rodney McKay, Colonel Sheppard and Ronan Dex."

"Well I have never heard of this Ronan Dex." Caldwell began with his arms folded across his chest. "Dr. McKay died when the Wraith kidnapped him and Major Sheppard was killed during the first siege of Atlantis."

"Then you haven't seen them?" Lorne asked and Caldwell merely shook his head. "Dr. Weir won't be pleased."

"Dr. Weir was also replaced around the same time that Major Sheppard met his end." Caldwell answered stonily. "Now, I suggest that seeing how this isn't your reality you four be on your way."

"Right away sir." Lorne agreed as he turned the dial.

oOo

Elizabeth just stared at John on their balcony. She was trying to keep her emotions in check but it was so hard.

"I guess some small part of me was hoping that you would still be alive out there somewhere." She answered finally after a long moment of silence. "But I guess after so long... it's natural to begin to give up hope- right?"

"I guess..." John agreed with a shrug. "But the Elizabeth I know would never give up."

"I'm not your Elizabeth though." Elizabeth stated as a gust of wind blew her hair behind her like a curtain. "Am I?"

"No." John agreed looking her in the eye. "You're not."

'My Elizabeth is strong.' He added silently, wondering how his own Elizabeth was holding up.

oOo

"I shouldn't have let Rodney turn this damn thing on." Elizabeth exploded as night descended upon their city.

"There was nothing that you could have done!" Zelenka answered patiently, having gone through this conversation a hundred times with Elizabeth already. "Rodney is a stubborn and arrogant man and he would have turned on the device with or without your permission. You said it yourself Dr. Weir that Teyla said that a 'Traveller' would be coming through the gate. We needed to know what this was..."

"I suppose" Elizabeth agreed with a sigh before she began to wheel herself out of the lab. "I'll be in my office."

oOo

". ...so I proposed to you?" John asked, trying to break the awkward silence that had descended upon Elizabeth and him.

"Yes." She answered, her voice softening. "Right here actually... god this is so hard."

"I'm sorry." John stated sympathetically, placing a hand on her shoulder in a gesture of comfort.

"The way you look at me-" She began, a sob escaping from her throat. "- it's different, there's no love in your eyes. Are you and your Elizabeth not-"

"Uh no-" John answered quickly- too quickly for his liking. "-we're just friends. We've helped each other out of a lot of tough situations over the years," He paused as grimaced though not from the memories. A pain was building through him and it reverberated in his bones. "-like a couple of weeks ago when she was injured in the Asuran attack but-"

"John?" Elizabeth asked worriedly as John collapsed against the railing. She could see him begin to phase out of her time and she knew what was happening. Instinctually she reached for her ear piece and contacted Carson.

"What is it lass?" Carson asked through the device.

"John's in trouble." Elizabeth answered as she held John tight. "I think that it might be entropic cascade failure."

"I'll be right there." Carson stated urgently before the line went dead.

"Hold on John-" Elizabeth pleaded, holding the unconscious John in her arms. - you have to hold on."

oOo

"How are you feeling?" Elizabeth asked as John regained consciousness in the infirmary with Carson looking over him. He merely grunted in reply and Elizabeth looked up worriedly at her CMO. " Carson, is he going to be alright?"

"Hard to say lass-" Carson answered honestly. "I've never dealt with anything like this."

"It's entropic cascade failure-" Rodney reminded with a groan. "There's nothing that you can do."

"And what about you Rodney?" Elizabeth asked turning towards the scientist. "Can you do anything for him? And Ronan?"

"I can get that damn gate working, that's what I can do."

"Get it working McKay- that's an order." John whispered through gritted teeth as he floated to consciousness for a moment."

"Yes sir." Rodney agreed and then he was gone.

John faded into unconsciousness again and Carson left him alone with Elizabeth who merely took his hand and tried to give him what little of her strength that she could.

"You have to hold on John-" She whispered quietly, trying to keep her voice stead. "-if not for me then for your own Elizabeth because I don't care what you say- the love wasn't there for me in your eyes, but I could see that it was there for her."

oOo

Kate Hieghtmeyer watched as Elizabeth played with her watch. From what little Kate had learned she knew that the watch had belonged to her father and that as a leader- Elizabeth only pulled it out when she was really distressed. "Dr. Weir?"

"Kate?" Elizabeth asked looking up. "What are you doing here?"

"Grapevine. I heard what happened."

"News travels very fast." Elizabeth murmured her eyes travelling back down to her watch.

"...Do you want to talk about it?"

The strong immobile leader of Atlantis merely shook her head and Kate knew that she had to say what Elizabeth needed to hear. "You blame yourself." She began watching as Elizabeth's eyes widened in shock. "You blame yourself but you shouldn't. The people of this expedition are very strong willed."

"That's what Zelenka said. But I'm responsible for them and since-"

"I know that the past few months have been tough Dr. Weir," Kate stated simply. "-but even you must realise that there are simply some things that are out of your control."

'That doesn't make me feel better.' Elizabeth thought to herself, but for the sake of Kate she nodded. "I suppose you're right."

oOo

"Alive-" Elizabeth breathed as she looked to Carson. "We're going to have to start sending out search parties. Radek has been running simulations based on space and time- he thinks he knows roughly where John is."

"Lass I know that this is huge." Carson began warily- watching as Elizabeth's excitement grew and grew. "But that is still a mighty lot of planets- like a needle in a haystack."

"I know Carson- but we have to find him. We just have too." Elizabeth answered firmly. "And it is quite possible that John's people are looking for them- and that's an even bigger haystack and an even smaller needle."

oOo

"We have to get out of here." Elizabeth shouted as Lorne and his team came through into another reality.

" Elizabeth!" John cried out trying to pull his leader out of harms way but an Asuran weapon shot through the air and pierced her thin and fragile body causing it to fall to the ground.

* * *

A/N- Hello beloved readers. Thank you to Gingercake, Lemons and HopelesslyEscaflowne for reviewing chapter 12 and thank you to HopelesslyEscaflowne for reviewing chapter 11 as well. I hope you all, and my other beloved readers enjoyed this chapter. And I hope that it's not too much of a cliffhanger for you guys. The next chapter will be up once I get 50 reviews (:D Gotta do something to get some feedback) 


	14. Holding On

**Chapter 14: Holding On **

"Major, how the hell did you get down here? I thought you were piloting a jumper." John asked, shouting over the noise.

"Uh, we're from a different reality sir." Lorne answered as he reloaded his gun

"Different reality?" Came a familiar voice.

" Carson?" Laura asked looking to her left- shocked to see Carson standing there, a gun in hand and alive and well.

"Laura?" Carson asked, he himself looking shocked to see Laura alive and well too.

After more shooting, John turned to look at Lorne. "Major, I take it that your Atlantis is still safe?" Lorne nodded and John smiled. "Good. Carson, take the ZPM and go with them."

"What?" Carson asked, not believing what he was hearing.

"You heard me! Atlantis is about to fall. Take the ZPM and go." John ordered. "I know that they aren't our people, but at least you'd be on a Atlantis that has survived- now go!"

To make sure that his orders were carried out John sprinted out of the lab and shut the door behind him- locking it as well.

"What's going on?" Lorne asked looking towards the closed door.

"The Asurans are attacking." Carson answered simply, dropping his gun on the ground. "Not good I know- but there's no way that we're going to make it out there... can I come with you Major?"

"Uh, I don't see why not." Lorne stated. "Our Carson died a couple months ago." He paused as the door began to buckle. "But I'll explain later..."

He turned the dial and in a flash of white light- disappeared.

oOo

"Sir, are we ever going to find them?" Laura asked as they arrived in yet another reality.

"I hope so Cadman. I hope so." Lorne agreed with a sigh.

"Cadman? Major Lorne?" Rodney asked his head peaking out from behind a control panel. "Is that you? Are you my Major Lorne?"

"I don't know- what was the last thing that you did."

"I activated this stupid thing and Ronan and Sheppard ended up here with me." Rodney answered motioning to the quantum gate.

"And Colonel Sheppard is a Colonel?" Lorne asked, watching as Rodney nodded. "And Atlantis is-?"

"On New 'Lantia of course...!"

"So far we're two for two." Lorne stated with a smile.

"What, don't you think that I'm your Rodney?" Rodney asked irritably, his hands on his hips. "Well, here's something that only I would know. A couple of months ago a jerk named 'Rod' came through to our reality and-"

"And this is our Rodney." Lorne answered with a smile. "We found you guys."

"Oh thank god." Rodney muttered in relief. "How did you find us?"

"This." Lorne answered simply pointing to the bracelet. "We can go home with this."

"See!" Rodney exclaimed turning to the silent Zelenka. "That's missing in this reality. No wonder I couldn't get this device to work. Now, let me just radio Elizabeth to get John and Ronan out of that damn infirmary and-"

Suddenly there was a groan of pain that stopped Rodney mid-sentence. "What was that?"

Carson stumbled forward and fell to the ground- his face looking to be in two directions at once. "Ugh- what is this?"

"Long story McKay." Lorne answered simply and quickly as he moved to help Carson to his feet. "Get our people down here."

"Rodney to Elizabeth..."

oOo

"I understand Rodney thank you." Elizabeth stated, answering the voice in her earpiece before turning to John who was now awake. "Your people found you."

He looked up in surprise and Elizabeth merely nodded. "You can go home now."

"Can you see Ronan and I to the lab?" John asked weakly.

"Of course."

oOo

"Dr. Weir!" Zelenka radioed his voice full of excitement. "Zelenka to Dr. Weir! Major Lorne and his team has found them!"

"Really?" Elizabeth asked, her eyes widening in surprise. Kate had left her hours ago and she had started to fall asleep.

"Yes," Zelenka stated excitedly. "And not only have they brought a ZPM what someone else as well..."

oOo

"Well it's been very enlightening." Rodney answered as he turned to walk through the quantum gate which allowed him to see his reality beyond it's shimmering surface.

"It has." Elizabeth agreed with a smile, watching as Ronan walked through to the other side. "Goodbye Rodney, don't get into too much trouble."

"I'll try not too."

oOo

" Carson!" Elizabeth exclaimed in shock as she was wheeled into the lab by Dr. Keller.

"Lass!" Carson exclaimed in shock as well. "You're alright- sorta..."

"You're alive..." Elizabeth whispered with a smile. "...I can't believe it."

"It's a long story lass..." Carson stated with his normal heart-warming smile and Elizabeth could only look to Major Lorne with thankful eyes.

"Good job Major."

"It was nothing ma'am."

And with that- Major Lorne, Rodney, Ronan, Lt. Cadman, Carson, Zelenka and the other two marines left the lab. Elizabeth wheeled herself over to the quantum mirror and saw her John talking to a spitting image of herself. She could see how close they were standing together and a pang of jealousy ran through her.

'Can you be jealous of yourself?' She thought wonderingly as she looked at the two of them.

"Guess this is goodbye then..." Elizabeth whispered quietly, watching her wheelchair bound self in the other reality.

"I guess it is." John answered simply as another wave of pain crashed through him. "I uh- just wanted to thank you Elizabeth- for helping us."

"It was nothing..." Elizabeth stated with a smile. "...you've given me hope. Knowing that he's still alive and out there somewhere- if it hadn't been for you I would have never known that my beloved John is alive."

"Yes well- you're welcome." John whispered awkwardly.

Elizabeth glanced into his reality and saw a look on her counterpart's face and smiled. "Your people are waiting..." She gazed back up at John. "...Take care of them. And take care of her- your Elizabeth. She cares for you more than you know." 

When John simply stared down at the Elizabeth before him in shock, she continued. "I know because she is me; we may be realities away but she's still me. And she looks at you the same way that I look at my own beloved John."

John was too stunned for words and Elizabeth had to smile. "Go,"

With a nod, John turned to face the gate- glancing over his shoulder only once to say; "Thank you."

And then he was gone and Elizabeth smiled. "Thank you-" She whispered to the empty room. "And goodbye, my beloved..."

* * *

A/N- Hello beloved readers. I've started school so this will be regulated to weekly monday updates. Thank you to Anuna and Ginger and Lemons for reviewing the last chapter- and hey, I'll do anything for a review. I hope that all my beloved readers will review this story cause I'm getting a boatload of hits...so PLEASE take the time to read and review this chapter. I would really apreciate it. You'll get another update soon if we get past 55 reviews... 


	15. Reasserting Reality

A/N- YAY! 55 Reviews. I asked, and you gave and now, you shall recieve!

**Chapter 15: Reasserting Reality**

John stepped through and met Elizabeth's eyes. Before him, he could see a weight lift off her and he wondered if the alternate reality Elizabeth that he meant was right about what she had said.

"It's good to see you safe. It's good to have you home." Elizabeth- his Elizabeth whispered and John had to smile and agree.

"It is good to be home."

oOo

Reality reasserted itself almost instantly. Carson, working in with Jennifer who was grateful to have her boss back- managed to reverse engineer the 'Ascension Device' to fix Elizabeth. In mere moments she was walking around again. Rodney managed to fix their DHD and they could once again dial Earth directly- especially with the ZPM that Carson brought powering Atlantis' systems.

oOo

"Teyla," Elizabeth began tentatively as she stepped into the isolated infirmary room which housed a very pregnant Teyla. It had only been about two weeks since they had found out that the young Athosian woman was pregnant and Elizabeth's heart reached out to her. "-how are you feeling?"

"Not well," Teyla admitted as she struggled to sit up. "-the monster within me is very restless."

"Well, Carson and Jennifer have tried to do all they can to terminate the child as per your wishes but-"

"-but the Wraith DNA is proving to be resilient." Teyla finished with a sigh. "I know, they have both made me aware of the situation."

"I'm sorry that we can't do anything for you and..." Elizabeth trailed off as she saw Teyla's eyes roll back into her head. Only the whites were showing and Teyla began to tremble. Elizabeth was about to call out to Carson, but Teyla began to speak in a voice that was not her own.

"On a planet where the people are advanced, the calm will be taken and the strong will be locked up. Only by trusting the heart will the calm be found again."

"Teyla?" Elizabeth asked worriedly as the machines started to beep around her. Instantly Carson and Jennifer were there trying to stabilize her.

In the end they managed too but Teyla had slipped into a coma.

"Well?" Elizabeth asked worriedly as Carson walked over to her.

"It's not good lass." He admitted sadly. "She's not doing good,"

"Surely there must be something that you can-"

"I'm sorry." Carson apologized. "Once the baby is born perhaps-"

"You really want to let it get that far?"

"I don't think we have a choice." Jennifer piped up. "Elizabeth, you mentioned that she said something?"

"Yes. Teyla said that on a planet where people are advanced the calm will be taken and the strong will be locked up. Only by trusting the heart will things be okay again."

"Any idea what that means lass?"

"I have no idea." Elizabeth answered honestly. "But I assume that we'll find out soon."

oOo

They did find out, sooner than they had hoped or wanted. John found himself in a spartan looking cell all the while wracking his brain in a vain attempt to figure out what was going on and what had happened.

He silently hoped that he would be able to see one of his team soon for it had been two or three days since he had had any human contact and his rations were beginning to run low. He was in one of the worst predicaments that he had ever gotten himself into and worst of all- he knew he was being charged with the death of someone he knew that he would never- ever kill.

"I couldn't have…." He whispered silently to himself, his head in his hands. "There is no way….she's not dead……she can't be…..I know she's not."

"Sheppard…." Rodney's voice broke John out of his pondering and with his panic rising again he walked to the bars of his cell and faced Rodney.

"McKay, you have to get me out of here." John pleaded, his hands gripping the bars of the cell, his knuckles ghastly white and his heart beating a mile a minute. "We have to find Elizabeth."

"Sheppard," McKay began slowly, his heart aching for his friend and the friend he had lost. "Elizabeth is dead. You ki-"

"I know!" John snapped slamming his hands against the bars and making them rattle. "I know all about the charges McKay, the Telarian government told me what happened." John barely paused to take a breath before soullessly reciting what he had been told. "Elizabeth is dead and I killed her. Her blood was found on my hands and shirt. I was found unconscious in her room."

"Yeah," Rodney agreed quietly. "That's what happened."

"Get a grip McKay." John ordered slamming his hands against the bars again, his anger rising once again. "Do you actually think that I killed her?"

"Well-" Rodney began, biting his lower lip and pausing to think.

"Oh come on Rodney." John chastised furiously, his anger bubbling over. "Give me some credit. I wouldn't kill Elizabeth……I couldn't have killed her….I….."

"The authorities said that you were drunk." Rodney interrupted looking away from John. "It was quite a party….."

"I had nothing to drink at the party Rodney," John insisted vehemently, though after thinking about it he did reconsider his statement. "The only drink I had was yours. I was stone cold sober. After the party, Elizabeth wanted to talk to me about something, I went to her room and-"

"And…….?"

"And nothing." John snapped going to sit down on the meagre bed that he had been provided. "I don't know what happened next McKay. I don't remember, it's like there is a wall there. I can remember everything before the party and up to the moment I knocked on Elizabeth's door but after that…." John sighed and shook his head.

"…after that, all I remember was waking up in that damn interrogation room and being told that Elizabeth was dead and that I killed her." John spit out the last few words as if they were poison.

"So you don't know anything." Rodney answered simply, leaning against the bars of the cell.

"No." John insisted as he got up and went to the bars of his cell again. "That's not true. I do know something."

"Well what is it Sheppard?"

"I know that I didn't kill Elizabeth." John insisted for what felt like the 100th time that day. "I know that Elizabeth isn't dead."

"And how do you know that?" Rodney asked, his hands crossed in front of his chest sceptically.

"I don't know." John admitted, leaning sideways against the bars of his cell. "But I just do." John paused and tried to think back to what happened. Again he came against that black, blank wall. He couldn't remember what happened, but somewhere, deep in his gut he knew that Elizabeth wasn't dead.

"I don't know," He repeated again looking up at McKay. "But I just do….my gut is telling me that Elizabeth is out there somewhere."

"Your gut?"

"Come off it McKay." John snapped. "Elizabeth is not dead and I did not kill her, I can tell you that for certain." John gripped the bars of his cell again and looked straight at Rodney. "Now, Elizabeth is out there somewhere and either you get me out of here or you go out there and find her yourself. Either way, we prove that I'm innocent."

"Alright, alright-" Rodney yielded, knowing that when John had a gut feeling, he was usually right. "I'll see what I can do."

"Thank you Rodney." John stated with a sigh of relief, it felt as though a weight had been lifted off his chest. Someone finally believed him- and it was Rodney of all people- finally he was getting somewhere- he just hoped that it wasn't too late for Elizabeth where ever she was.

"Don't thank me yet." Rodney answered pessimistically when he noticed the relief on John's face. "It's going to be almost impossible to get you out of here,"

"So go find her." John ordered. "And do it quick because it's been two days already, you have to find what happened to her."

"I don't even know where to start." Rodney complained.

"Start with the Prime Minister," John suggested. "He was acting awfully nervous around his second in command- maybe you can get him to slip and let me out of here."

"Prime Minister Kellan?"

"He's the one." John confirmed as two guards approached Rodney, signalling that his visiting hours were up.

"Alright." Rodney sighed both to the guards and to John. "I'll see what I can do."

"Thank you Rodney." John thanked again as his friend was led out of the cell and once Rodney was gone, John was left alone again to contemplate his fate- and Elizabeth's.

'Thank god Rodney believes me.' John thought to himself as he laid down on the lumpy bed. 'At least now we can get something done- but its been two days…..who knows where she is now….she could be on another planet by now.'

'Now stop thinking like that' John chastised himself as he rolled over onto his side. 'Elizabeth is probably here somewhere-'

'But what if she's not- what if she's gone- what if….' John gulped at the thought. 'What if I really did kill her?'

'Don't think like that Sheppard.' John snapped at himself as he rolled onto his other side so he was now facing the wall. 'If you don't believe that you're innocent, how in hell can you expect for Rodney or anyone else to believe you?'

* * *

A/N- And thus begins my 'Only Hope' storyline for those of you who might have happened upon it on my main page. This is going to be a rather substantial part of MY version of season four and I hope that I've sufficiantly grabbed your interest. Thank you to my dear reviewers HE, Jenni, Lemons Ginger, shweir rule and dear Anuna. Between the six of you I've got 55 reviews and I'm loving it:D So please, take the time to read and review this chapter too... and lemme see, I'll update the next chapter when I get 60 reviews. :D I know that it's kinda lame, but TONS of people are hitting this story and it only takes two seconds to review and say either 'hey I liked it' or 'hey this stunk' Preferably, you'll all like it but I won't know until you review so PLEASE beloved readers, REVIEW! 


	16. Thinking Things Over

A/N- I'm at 59 reviews and I figure that that's close enough, specially conisdering I've seen the leaked episodes I want to get to my version of the actual season 4 ASAP. So without further ado...

**Chapter 16: Thinking Things Over **

'I couldn't have killed her-' John told himself for the millionth time as another day passed only he finally received some nourishment. 'Even if I was drunk- which I wasn't……I……' John paused and laid back on his back, unable to even mentally verbalize his feelings. Over the past three years they had gotten close, very close and it seemed (at least in the past few months) that one of them was stuck in situations of doom.

'Like when Elizabeth was being attacked by those nanites,' John thought to himself as he looked up at the ceiling. 'God,' he thought with a shiver. 'That was horrible, 5 hours and I couldn't do anything to help her……or waiting for her to wake up after she had been injured when Atlantis left its original home...' John sighed and closed his eyes, but when he did he was confronted by the look on her face when he had told her about Telarians. 'She was so excited….'

John sighed and thought back to that day a week ago, when he and his team had come through the gate from M3X-K57 and told Elizabeth about the technologically advanced and friendly Telarians……

...It was just another routine mission for John and his team. They had gone through the gate to M3X-K57 which according to the database had once been an ancient out post. On the other side they had been shocked to see a thriving industrial civilization and they were even more surprised to learn that this civilization was friendly and was willing to meet with Elizabeth to discuss the terms of their treaty. So, John and his team came back to Atlantis and debriefed Elizabeth about their potential new allies.

"They sound wonderful." Elizabeth stated with a smile as she looked at John from across the briefing table. "But are they for real?"

"Well of course they're real." John insisted. "We certainly didn't make them up."

"What I think she means is that are they legitimate." Rodney pointed out sarcastically. "You know, if they really who they say they are….and I agree with her cause our tract record with allies hasn't been too great lately."

"I know that." John stated rolling his eyes. "But honestly, did you think that there was something wrong with them?"

"Well no-" Rodney admitted. "But still-"

The debate had raged on and yet against all the opposing views, Elizabeth agreed to walk through the gate to meet their new allies.

"It can't possibly hurt." She explained as the meeting was dismissed. "And besides, maybe something useful will be gained from it."

oOo

"Dr. Elizabeth Weir-" The Telarian Minister of Peace- Jal G'dan welcomed with open arms. "-it is a pleasure to welcome to Telaria."

"Thank you Minister." Elizabeth thanked, bowing as Jal had done. "I understand that we will be receiving a tour of the city?"

"By myself no less." Jal stated with a smirk which caused John to squirm. "Come-" He began holding out his arm for Elizabeth to take- which she did. "-let us begin."

oOo

"And this is our most secret lab." Jal continued as he ushered Elizabeth, Rodney, Ronan and John into a lab. Like the rest of the grand city it was built of a shining metal but it was what was on the table in the centre of the room that caught their attention.

"Rodney-" Elizabeth began, her eyes widening in shock. "-is that-?"

"Yes." Rodney confirmed, taking a step closer to the orange/yellow device. " Elizabeth yes it is."

"It's a ZPM." John pointed out, eying Jal G'dan suspiciously. "But the only people that we know of who can make ZPMs are the Ancients-"

"-and the Asurans." Elizabeth finished taking a wary step back from the Minister of Peace. Ronan and John instantly raised their guns. "You're Asurans?"

"No." Jal G'dan assured his hands up in peace. "We are not the Asurans I assure you. We just stumbled upon some of the ancestors writings and have finally been able to build upon them."

"Are you sure?" Elizabeth asked warily as Rodney looked up from the schematics.

"Yes." Rodney confirmed before Jal G'dan could. " Elizabeth their not Asurans."

"How do you know?"

"Well for one thing Sheppard the Asurans have no need for salt water." Rodney pointed out. "These versions of ZPM require salt water."

"Yes." Jal G'dan agreed. "That is what we were hoping to discuss with you."

"You want to trade for salt water?" Elizabeth asked her eyes lighting up while John and Ronan lowered their respective weapons. "In exchange for-"

"I will leave the negotiations to our Prime Minister Kellan." Jal interrupted. "But you will not be able to speak to him before The Grand Ball which is to take place tonight."

"The Grand Ball?" Elizabeth asked curiously. "What's the celebration?"

"We are celebrating the Prime Minister's thirtieth year governing our planet." Jal answered.

"He's been governing for thirty years?" John asked curiously. "How's that even possible?"

"Thirty-One years ago our planet was in decay and ruin." Jal answered as he led the Atlantean team out of the lab. "We were a fractured world made up of over two-hundred independent nations. Prime Minister Kellan saw that we were heading towards our own destruction and slowly over the period of a year he managed to bring all the nations together."

"Under his rule." Ronan finished sceptically.

"Of course under his rule." Jal confirmed. "Who else would we allow govern our people?"

"And this Kellan, has he had any opposition over the years?" Rodney asked as they continued walking along the corridors of the fine city.

"Oh much." Jal confirmed with a laugh. "We have several factions on this planet who make up the opposing parties but the people never seem to want to give them the opportunity to plunge Telar into ruin."

"That's how Kellan has been ruling for thirty years?"

"Yes." Jal stated as he turned to Elizabeth who once again was on his arm. "That is how."

oOo

While the group continued to get a tour of the facility John was trying to contain what he knew as jealously. It was directed at Jal G'dan who seemed to have Elizabeth completely in his thrall.

'I don't get it.' He muttered silently to himself as they continued walking. 'This guy seems normal enough but-'

John shook his thoughts aside as they passed through another lab. There inside he thought that he could hear the metallic click of something- but when he craned his head to see into the windows there was nothing there.

* * *

A/N- Hello beloved readers. And thank you to lakewater, HE, lemons and Suz for reviewing the last chapter. I hope that you four and the rest of my beloved readers who are reading this will take the time to review this chapter and seeing on how I've got a couple chapters in reserve there should be an update on Monday- so please review and check out my other Sparky stories in the meantime... 


	17. Dancing with Destiny

**Chapter 17: Dancing with Destiny**

The Grand Ball took place that night. John, Ronan, Rodney and Elizabeth were all given the appropriate clothes to wear. John, Ronan and Rodney were each given a pair of suits that hugged the body firmly and John idly mused if Ronan had managed to hide any weapon on his person.

'Of course he would have...' John decided finally as he looked at how Ronan's hair was done. '...he's always prepared.'

Silently, with some incoherent rumblings from Rodney they three guys made their way to the grand ballroom where they were stunned by the amount of twinkle lights, and flowing white fabrics. The overall effects was a veritable winter wonderland crossed with the realm of the fae and even Rodney, who was not easily impressed- was impressed.

"This is so cool." He exclaimed quietly to Ronan who merely smiled at Rodney's childishness.

"I think that it's over the top."

"Well I think that it's..." John began as trumpets began to call and three figures descended down the stairs. The one in the lead was obviously Prime Minister Kelar. He was a man in his later years, with crystal blue eyes and greying hair. His face sported a distinguished hook nose and he was draped in a robe of royal blue accented with gold. Behind them was the Minister of Peace Jal G'dan who was wearing a black suit that matched the ones that John, Ronan and Rodney were wearing and on his arm was...

"Elizabeth?" Rodney whispered with a mixture of shock and awe as their leader descended down the stairs. "She looks good."

Elizabeth was wearing an off the shoulder white gown that hugged her body to the waist and then flared slightly down to her knees. On her feet was a pair of dainty white slippers with crystals on the top. Her hair hung over her shoulders, framing her face and was accented by a crystal band that held the longer pieces out of her eyes.

Her eyes, John noted were sparkling with amusement and merriment even though her face showed some discomfort at all the attention. An announcer stated who the three of them were and the crowd eventually began talking amongst themselves again.

John, Rodney and Ronan meanwhile watched as Elizabeth leaned over to take to Jal as he led her to the high table.

"Wow." Rodney muttered shaking his head. "I had no idea."

"She looks good." Ronan agreed, stunned himself slightly at Elizabeth's angelic appearance but it was John who was speechless. "What about you Sheppard?"

"Uh- what?" John asked awkwardly turning his attention from Elizabeth to Ronan.

"He asked you what you thought of Elizabeth's appearance." Rodney muttered with a roll of his eyes.

"Oh well," John began, stumbling over his words. "She looks- er- nice I guess."

"Just nice?" Asked a voice from behind him and John whirled around to come face to face with Jal G'dan and a very hurt looking Elizabeth. "I think that your Dr. Weir is looking most elegant tonight."

'Utterly stunning, and beautiful and gorgeous' John added silently in his mind trying to block her disappointed hazel eyes out of his minds eye.

"Minister G'dan," Elizabeth began her voice and demeanour masking her true emotions. "-perhaps we should go back to the head table. The Prime Minister and I have much to discuss."

"I agree." Jal stated with a nod. "But do call me Jal."

"Only if you call me Elizabeth."

"You have a deal." Jal responded with a laugh as he led Elizabeth away from her friends. "Your first of many tonight I hope."

As they walked away Rodney and Ronan were kinda stunned but John was out and out flabbergasted...Had she just blown him off? He thought despairingly to himself as a knot of jealousy wound itself around his heart. 'How could she just—'

"Come on Shep." Ronan stated interrupting John's thoughts. "Let's go grab something to eat, I'm starving."

oOo

The night progressed and soon the dinner had been dispensed with, as had the long and boring speeches and the people at the Grand Ball were dancing the night away. Much to his surprise both Ronan and Rodney had been asked to dance by two Telarian natives and had accepted while he, though being asked several times- decided to stick to the wall.

It was approaching midnight when Rodney stumbled over to John having just a tad to much to drink. "What are you doing on the wall Sheppard?"

"Having a good time." John answered blandly, wincing slightly at Rodney's laugh.

"Somehow I doubt that." Rodney disagreed, following John's gaze. The scientist came to see Elizabeth, with flushed cheeks dancing with the Minister of Peace and suddenly he got it. "Jealous much?"

"I'm not jealous." John defended far too quickly.

"Oh sure." Rodney scoffed as he took another sip of the wine that was being served. "And the Wraith don't suck the life out of people..."

"Rodney..."

"You know, I don't get it." Rodney began, honestly not sure what John would be jealous at Elizabeth dancing with the Minister of Peace. "You're a Kirk Sheppard, why do you care if Elizabeth is dancing with some Minister of peace unless..." Suddenly Rodney stopped, nearly dropping his wine glass as his slightly fuddled mind put two and two together. The thought was almost too incomprehensible, yet he had to ask the question. "You don't..."

"Just shut up McKay." John snapped as he snatched Rodney's wine glass out of his hands, drained what was left in the glass (which was most of it) and quite obviously stressed, began to meander in the direction of Elizabeth and Jal G'dan.

"He does..." Rodney whispered silently to himself as he watched John glare at Jal for a couple moments before finally walking up behind the dancing couple. "...how did I not see it before?"

And as John tapped Jal on the shoulder a horrifying though struck Rodney. 'My God, I could owe Zelenka a ton...'

oOo

"Excuse me." John interrupted tapping Jal on the shoulder bringing his dance with Elizabeth to an abrupt halt. "But may I interrupt?"

"Of course."

Jal bowed and let John take his place and allow Elizabeth into his arms. Vaguely, in some part of him mind John knew that this was the closest that he and Elizabeth had stood together in a fair long while and a part of him struggled to keep his jealousy in check.

They danced silently for a few moments before Elizabeth broke the ice. "You look quite dashing tonight John."

"As do you." John stated suddenly, stumbling over his words. "Beautiful I mean and-"

"That's not what you said earlier."

"Oh well..." John paused as him mind spun frantically thinking for a line. He was the master of lines, he was the 'Kirk' of the Pegasus Galaxy, he could get any alien girl in a second...

...so why did Elizabeth make him so nervous sometimes?

"...I said that for Rodney's sake." John explained with ease, flashing his classic fly-boy grin. "He thought that you looked good and was afraid that I might go all 'Kirk' on you or something."

Elizabeth laughed. "I have read his reports, he's called you a 'Kirk' more times then I've cared to count."

They danced silently before Elizabeth spoke up again. "Is there any truth to it?"

"Truth to what?" John asked blankly, too caught up in the moment to process what she was saying.

"Truth to Rodney's teasing." Elizabeth asked softly as John unconsciously pulled her closer. Her right hand felt like it was trembling in his and her left felt all sweaty on his back- yet neither was true. She was the same, outwardly calm Elizabeth- it was only her heart that was going in circles.

"Are you a Kirk?" She asked finally, looking up into his eyes, almost afraid of the answer.

"Uh..." He was at a loss, unsure on what to say. So he told the truth. "Not intentionally. I mean, I am the Mr. Fantastic of the teams so I guess that's why but—" John paused momentarily and looked into her eyes and saw that, despite being veiled- her emotions were raging within her. "—but as to if there's any truth to them? No." He shook his head and gave her hand a little squeeze. "I'm not a Kirk...not anymore at least."

"What changed?" Elizabeth asked, thinking back to their first year on Atlantis.

Back then, he had been willing to risk everything to see if Chaya was alright. Her mind then thought of when he had been trapped behind the time dilation field and had said goodbye to that Teer woman- she had looked at John with so much love in her eyes and for a moment she had been horribly frightened that he would agree to ascend with her.

There had been other instances that she knew about- one he had even confided in her about.

_I even got the girl_

_You got the girl!?_

_Well I mean I could have got the girl... I turned her down._

"What changed?" She asked again, watching as John looked away clearly embarrassed. And it seemed that he was about to answer when Jal G'dan tapped him on the shoulder.

"I am terribly sorry." Jal apologized as John and Elizabeth jumped apart slightly. "But Prime Minister Kelar is ready to talk with you Elizabeth at the head table..."

"Thank you." Elizabeth stated coldly stepping out of John's arms and onto Jal's as he held it out like before. And before John's eyes, Elizabeth was swallowed into the crowd and he was left on his own...again.

* * *

A/N- Hello beloved readers. Thank you as always to Jenni, HE, lakewater and lemons for reviewing the last chatper. I hope that you all like this one too and I hope that all my readers who read this chapter will review this one. Cause I gotta say, I've seen the leaked episodes and I gotta say--- the potential angst might just be worth it (though I love where I'm heading with this too). So please read and review. 


	18. Conversations with the Past

**Chapter 18: Conversations with the Past**

Elizabeth passed several people on her way to the head table, and while many of them were unfamiliar there were one or two gangly, sulking men against the walls that looked very familiar.

'I must have just passed them in the halls,' Elizabeth rationalized. 'How else could I have recognized them...'

The night slipped into early morning and John stood like a stone at the wall. Rodney consumed more than his fair share of alcohol as did Ronan. The two of them were laughing and joking with two Telarian women and John just had to shake his head. He then went to survey the ballroom which was slowly emptying of people. However, there in a corner was Elizabeth, Prime Minister Kellan and Minister of Peace Jal G'dan.

Once again the jealously began to brew but it was suddenly abated when Elizabeth looked up from her negotiating and smiled at him. She was clearly in her element, trying to negotiate for the acquisition for two of the Telarian's ZPMs in exchange for some of the abundant seawater that Atlantis possessed.

As John watched he saw that Elizabeth tried to stifle several yawns in a row. After she tried to stifle the seventh consecutive yawn, he knew that it was time to get her out of there.

"Excuse me," He interrupted as politely as he could, catching the 'thank you' glance from Elizabeth. "-but it's time for us to check in home and I'm sure that Dr. Weir would like to do that before she falls asleep at the table."

"Oh, forgive me." Prime Minister Kellan apologized profusely as he looked around, noticing for the first time that the party had begun to break up. "It seems as though we have completely monopolized your time."

"That's alright." Elizabeth stated with a smile. "But if you two will excuse me."

"Would you like an escort back to the gate Elizabeth?" Jal asked hopefully, standing up at the same time as Elizabeth. John, bristling with jealousy was about to answer when Elizabeth did it for him.

"Thank you for the offer Jal but I have an escort," She paused and turned to John who merely nodded. "-so if you will excuse me, we can continue our discussions in the morning."

"Of course," Jal answered not hiding his disappointment very well. "In the morning..."

With that, Elizabeth left the table with the two Telarian Ministers at it and John was close behind.

The walk out of the city towards the gate was spent in comfortable silence. Once there, Elizabeth dialled the gate while John kept a watchful eye all around them. Something was setting the warning bells in his head off and he was afraid that something might try to ambush them.

"Atlantis, this is Dr. Weir."

"Hello and good afternoon Dr. Weir," Came the friendly voice of Chuck through Elizabeth's radio. "-what can I do for you?"

"Well, it's early, early morning here Chuck," Elizabeth answered, her smile and tiredness evident through her voice. "-and all I need you to do is to make sure Atlantis runs smoothly for the next couple days."

"Days ma'am?"

"Yes," Elizabeth answered again, only with a sigh this time. "I made some good progress with the Telarians today but I get the feeling that it will still be a long process to get what we want- and need."

"Very well then ma'am."

"No problems so far Chuck?" Elizabeth asked, internally hoping for a problem that would call for her and John's team to return.

"No ma'am." Chuck answered. "Everything is working out wonderfully."

"Everything?" Elizabeth asked again, trying to give a hint to Chuck that she wanted to come home.

"Everything."

"Very well then." Elizabeth stated trying to hide the disappointment in her voice, but it was an emotion that John picked up on. "We'll contact you again at 1400 hours tomorrow."

"Very well ma'am." Chuck answered. "Atlantis out."

The gate cut off and Elizabeth was bathed in darkness once more. She heard a rustling behind her and whiled around. By the faint light of the two crescent moons that hung in the Telarian sky she could see John there before her.

"Oh John!" She exclaimed startled for a moment. "You scared me."

"Sorry," He answered apologetically. "But we should be getting back."

"Yes." Elizabeth agreed as they began to walk back towards the city. "Yes we should."

They were half way back when Elizabeth picked up the conversation that had been interrupted on the dance floor.

"You never answered my question."

"Huh?" John asked, startled out of his own world for a moment.

"I said that you never answered my question." Elizabeth repeated, knowing that John was not one to talk about his feelings. She also knew that to keep him talking she would have to be slow and patient and maybe then she would get the answers that she was seeking.

"And what question was that?" John asked curiously, playing dumb. He knew full well what the question was, but he wasn't prepared to answer it. Not yet at least, and certainly not to Elizabeth of all people.

Elizabeth smiled, knowing what John was doing. "You know what question, John."

"No." John protested shaking his head as they re-entered the city. "I don't know what question you're talking about."

"Well when we were dancing," Elizabeth began, a slight blush rising on her cheeks- something that John didn't notice and even if he had Elizabeth mused that he would just dismiss it as a by product of the wine she had consumed that evening. "I asked you a question."

"Uh-huh and..."

"And I would like to know the answer."

"Oh well..." John fell silent, trying to compose his answer. However, while he was thinking they arrived back in their residential building and right in front of Elizabeth's quarters.

"Well..." She began slowly, as she gripped the handle leading into her room "...I guess this is where we say goodnight."

"Yeah," John agreed, grimacing inwardly for not having the courage to answer her question. "I suppose that it is..."

"You know, you could come in for a while and we could finish our conversation."

John was speechless, here she was giving him the opportunity to tell her exactly WHY he wasn't a 'Kirk' and yet...

"I think that it would be a conversation better suited for a less—"

"A less stressful time?" Elizabeth suggested, watching as John nodded. She sighed inwardly and merely nodded. "Alright then, goodnight."

"Goodnight."

And with that John turned away and he heard the door click open and the beginnings of Elizabeth's scream before all went black.

oOo

'Elizabeth screamed?' John asked himself as he sat up in his cell. 'I didn't remember that before...' He pondered this new development as he ran the memory over in his head a couple more times. '...and I was walking away, I didn't remember that before.'

Relief suddenly washed over him. 'If I remember walking away then I know that I DIDN'T kill her- if she was even killed at all...'

Sunlight began to seep into his cell and John hoped that Rodney would get back ASAP.

"I have new information to give to the authorities," John mumbled, filling the silence with his voice. "-hopefully it will be enough that I can get out of here..."

Slowly, John laid back down on his meagre cot and let his thoughts drift- though they were never far away from the woman that he was deathly afraid for.

'Where ever you are Elizabeth,' He promised himself as he drifted off to sleep. 'I will find you, I promise you that...'

oOo

Meanwhile, in the bowels of Tel the capitol city, far beneath the prison cell that John was trapped in, Elizabeth sat still and unmoving and as cold as stone. She shivered and wrapped her arms around her shoulders in a vain attempt to warm herself up.

"I don't know HOW I could have been so STUPID!" Elizabeth mumbled, chastising herself out loud. "If I hadn't been so dismissive, if I-"

"Come, come now Doctor Weir." Stated a very silky evil voice as the door to her cell opened. "Even you must make mistakes sometimes." Elizabeth looked up and saw the horrible scarred face of Acastus Kolya and she inwardly shivered in fear and utter shock though outwardly her demeanour was one of stone.

"Tell me," Kolya continued. "-what do you think of my little trap?"

* * *

A/N- OO Kolya's back! -giggle- Yes, Kolya's back. How? Well, you guys will just have to tune in to next monday to find out. To those of you who reviewed the last chapter, HE, Ginger, Suz, lemons and lake I gotta say I loved your reviews and I hope that you (and others) will take the time to review this chapter too. And you guys will be glad to know that this story has almost doubled in length in the past week (thank the leaked episodes for that) and well... just wait till next week. :D So, TTFN- Ta Ta For Now! 


	19. Realizations

**Chapter 19: Realizations **

"You!?" Elizabeth exclaimed in shock as she gazed upon the face of Kolya. "I thought you were dead."

"I thought so too." He answered gleefully looking down at his body. "But clearly I'm not."

"How is that even possible?"

"Oh, you'd be surprised what measures I employed to ensure that I would stay immortal."

It was then that one of the men who had come into the cell with Kolya shot him. The bullet pierced his collar bone and flew out his back, impacting on the wall behind him. Elizabeth then watched in horror as Kolya remained standing and healed himself. Not in the manner of an organic being, but by 'refreshing' himself all at once.

"You're-"

"What you would call a replicator." Kolya answered with a smile. "Yes. You see, before I ambushed Colonel Sheppard the last time, I had stumbled across an old outpost of the ancients. It was badly damaged but one lab was still fully functioning. Within I found the research which was in a language close to my own."

"That's not possible." Elizabeth stated defiantly shaking her head. "The ancients used a different language and-" She sighed and shook her head again. "It's just not possible."

"Oh but it is." Kolya insisted. "You see, there was an ancestor who thought that ascending would be a waste of his time. He wanted to remain on this plane of existence but to do so he would have to remain mortal. Of course, that being impossible he took what research that the others had been doing and found a way to not only take the research that created the Asurans but to transfer his consciousness to it. He survived for almost ten-thousand years, but he constantly had to create a new body for himself and then-"

"And then what?"

"And then nothing." Kolya answered simply. "It seems as though the wraith attacked the outpost at that time and destroyed what was left of it- minus the lab of course. You see this ancestor watched over the fledging human population on his planet and tracked their language development. Over time he began to use it to record his findings and thus, I was able to use them."

"So you're a replicator now." Elizabeth stated, trying to calm her shock. "You can't die."

"Oh I can still die, but my men have been trained on the uses of this machine and will simply recreate this body, but tell me-" Kolya began, smirking. "You never told me what you think of this little trap of mine."

"This little trap as you are so fond of calling it is a disaster." Elizabeth answered stoically, her eyes like steel as she glared at the man who had caused her and her team so much trouble in the past. "There is no way that the Telarian government will let me stay missing for long and-"

"And nothing Dr. Weir." Kolya interrupted laughing maniacally. "They think that you are dead."

"Colonel Sheppard will not believe that."

"Oh Colonel Sheppard isn't in a place to do anything right now." Kolya smirked, taunting her.

"What do you mean?" She asked, the first vestiges of fear beginning to show. "What did you do to him?"

"I did nothing to him really," Kolya answered. "I just implicated him in your murder."

"What?"

Kolya smirked at Elizabeth's reaction and she bit her lower lip. Her shocked exclaimation ended up being more emotional than she would have liked and as she glared at Kolya she could see that he was amused.

"Yes," Kolya stated a bemused look on his face. "Ironic isn't it, after all the times he's saved your life he now believes that he has taken it."

"I don't believe that." Elizabeth stated firmly. "John won't believe that."

"I don't think he has much of a choice, you see when my two men jumped you I myself gave Colonel Sheppard a memory inhibiting drug. It's virtually undetectable and-"

"And nothing." Elizabeth interrupted, straining against the metal clasps that kept her bound by her feet to the floor. "No drug can change what he knows."

"Oh?" Kolya asked, joyfully perplexed that Elizabeth was so determined to convince herself, and him that John was not fooled by his ruse. "And what does he know?"

Elizabeth hesitated before answering. She could tell Kolya many things, but she chose on a single response to statisfy her own racing heart. "He knows that he would never, EVER kill me." Elizabeth answered. "And for that matter, Rodney and Ronan know that too. They will figure out what you've done to me and r-"

"Rescue you?" Kolya interrupted, barely stifling a laugh. "How could they rescue you? Doctor McKay and Ronan think that you are dead and Colonel Sheppard is in prison awaiting his death sentence and-"

"What?!?"

"Oh," Kolya murmured realising that he had forgotten something vital. "I forgot, the punishment for murder here on Telar is death... I suppose that Colonel Sheppard has a mere couple days to live and then..."

Kolya let his sentence trail off and watched with an almost gleeful stare as Elizabeth's eyes widened and her resolve began to crumble.

'I have to get out of here.' Elizabeth thought fearfully to herself. 'I have to get out of here and let John know that I'm alright...' She took a couple of breaths and lowered her eyes to the floor. 'I can't let him die... not thinking that he's...' She couldn't bring herself to think about it because she had to stay strong- she knew that. 'John will find me.' Elizabeth thought determinedly. 'He will find me...'

'He has to find me.'

* * *

A/N- Hello beloved readers. Well, Adrift has aired and while I thought that it was an alright episode- I didn't like it. I think that my version's much better. As a result I've updated this next chapter out of my rapidly thinning buffer. Gotta say thank you to my beloved loyal reviewers Jenni, Ginger and lemons for reviewing the last chapter. I'm glad that you all liked the cliffhanger plot twist and I hope you all like how I've explained it. :D So please, take the time to read and review and if I get enough reviews I might update on Friday... 


	20. Remember The Lost

**Chapter 20: Remember the Lost**

She was witness to an execution. She was one among many and she watched in horror as a man with unruly black hair and deep soulful eyes was led up onto a platform. The platform held a firing squad and he was placed right in front of him.

She struggled against the crowds trying to make her way to the platform while trying to tell someone, anyone who might listen that she as indeed alive and that there was no need to go through with the atrocity that they were about to commit.

No one heard her pleas, nor did they hear her screams. Instead they heard through the din of their own cheers the sound of the guns being fired and the horribly lifeless sound that the man made as he dropped the ground.

It was then that the crowd began to disperse and she raced towards the front of the platform where the man had fallen off and collapsed beside his body.

He was John Sheppard, and he was dead.

"No," She, Elizabeth cried as she rolled him over so that she could see his face. "You can't die, you can't die... don't die. Don't die on me..."

His face was lifeless and Elizabeth's heart felt like it had been torn out of her chest.

"No..." She sobbed, tracing the contours of John's lifeless face. "Please John you can't be dead... not when I have so much to tell you..."

Suddenly there was a pain her ankle that caused her to close her eyes. When she opened them again she convulsed and found herself back in her cell, still wearing the white gown that she had worn to the ball days before- and still tied to the floor in the deep dank cell that Kolya had put her in. And she wondered, if this was John's day to die.

oOo

"So am I getting out of here?" John asked as he saw Rodney approaching his cell.

"No."

"Well what did you find out?"

"Honestly nothing." Rodney answered honestly shaking his head.

"There must have been something." John pleaded. "Come on Rodney, you HAVE to know something, I've been in here for DAYS!"

"I know, I know." Rodney admitted throwing his hands up in defeat. "But Prime Minister Kellan had nothing to say except that Minister Jal G'dan was found dead in his room."

"So there is a murderer loose."

"If there is then they're long gone by now." Rodney countered as he leaned against the bars. "It seemed as though good old Jal had been dead for three weeks or so."

"What?!?" John exclaimed. "You call that nothing?"

"Well, nothing as in it doesn't do you any good."

"Of course it does!" John insisted. "If the Minister of Peace has been dead for three weeks then who was that Elizabeth danced with?"

"I don't know." Rodney admitted. "But whoever he was he certainly was the spitting image of the real Minister of Peace and-"

And in one brilliant moment of clarity, John remembered what had happened.

_Elizabeth had screamed, John had turned around and raced into her room. There before him was Minister Jal G'dan holding her unconscious in her arms while another figure of a female in a white dress was collapsed on the ground._

_John practically growled in anger. "Put her down right now."_

"_Oh I don't think so Colonel Sheppard." Jal answered, only his voice was wrong- and yet it seemed so familiar. Before his eyes John watched as Jal morphed into Kolya. _

"_You!?"_

"_Yes me." Kolya confirmed with a laugh before nodding slightly. _

_The next thing John knew was being attacked by two men. He kicked and punched and tried to knock them out. But they over powered him and soon got his arms around his back, causing him to be trapped. _

"_You're going to go to sleep for a little while," Kolya began with an evil laugh as another one of his men came out of the shadows holding a syringe. "And when you wake up, you will have no memory of the past few minutes and everyone will think that Elizabeth has been killed by you..."_

"It was Kolya." John stated suddenly causing Rodney to look at him in surprise. "It was Kolya!"

"Kolya's dead."

"No, no he's not." John insisted. "He's alive, and he has Elizabeth."

"Again, you're wrong." Rodney argued. "Elizabeth it in the morgue, I've seen the body myself."

"No, no, no!" He argued. "Go check again, see their results."

"What good would that do?"

"Kolya said that everyone will think that I killed Elizabeth," John began, putting the pieces together. "But that's impossible since he was holding her hostage."

"What?"

"Rodney just go check it out!" John barked causing Rodney to flinch.

"Alright, alright." He agreed sceptically. "I'll go."

oOo

Rodney only did half of what he promised he would do. Instead of going to the morgue he went to the gate to check in with Carson, who told him the most extraordinary thing.

"The blood sample doesn't belong to Elizabeth."

"Are you sure Carson?" Rodney asked, back in Atlantis where he and the CMO were talking. "Are you absolutely sure?"

"I'm quite positive Rodney," Carson assured. "I compared the sample you gave me to the one I had on file for Elizabeth. They are 99.9 different."

"So what does that mean?"

"It means that the blood doesn't belong to Elizabeth and therefore she-"

"-she might not be dead." Rodney interrupted, putting the pieces together. "My god, Sheppard might have been telling the truth."

"Truth about what Rodney?" Carson asked curiously, noting that Rodney was in his 'thinking' mode.

Rodney merely mumbled a response before motioning to Chuck to dial up the gate. Before Carson could even get another word in Rodney was gone.

* * *

A/N- Hello there! Update! Things are progressing nicely in this little AU of mine and while I adored Lifeline and it is one of my top three Sparky episodes of all time it was far to painful to watch... but check out 'We Have Her' if you want to know how it should have ended. But back to this lil version of season 4. Thank you those of you who reviewed the last chapter, mainly Jenni, Wormhole, Lakewater and lemons. I hope you guys will take the time to review this chapter as well. :D And Jenni, what did you have in mind for a colaberation? 


	21. Freeing the Strength

**Chapter 21: Freeing the Strength **

"I need to see Prime Minister Kellan right away." Rodney stated as he approached the front desk of the Telarian central administrative office.

"I am sorry," The woman, Kellan's secretary apologized as she looked up from her papers. "But the Prime Minister cannot be disturbed right now and-"

"It's alright Delnara," Kellan interrupted as he stepped out of his office. "Dr. McKay can come in."

Silently, though sneaking an 'I'm better than you,' glance at Delnara, Rodney stepped into the Prime Minister's office. It was a simple looking room, with no windows and very bright lighting. Rodney noticed that Kellan had two chairs on either side of his glass desk and that he had alright sat down in one. Therefore Rodney took the other one.

"What can I do for you Dr. McKay?"

"You can let my friend go."

"You know that I cannot do that." Prime Minister Kellan argued. "You know what he has been convicted of."

"Yes, I know." Rodney agreed. "But you need to check the blood sample that I've brought with me with the woman that is in your morgue. It's not Elizabeth."

"That's not possible."

"That's what I thought." Rodney began, his pace increasing as he began to speak. "But John- Colonel Sheppard now remembers being ambushed and given a memory inhibiting drug. He was ambushed by Jal G'dan-"

"Jal G'dan is dead and-"

"-and I know that." Rodney interrupted frustrated. "Don't you think I know that?" He sighed and tried to calm down. "See it wasn't the real Jal G'dan, it was a man named Kolya- or at least, that's what Sheppard says and it was Kolya who kidnapped Elizabeth and implicated the Colonel in her murder."

"That is a highly unlikely story." Kellan dismissed.

"That's what I thought but something about this never made any sense," Rodney explained, trying to get the Prime Minister to see reason. "I knew that there would be NO way that Sheppard would ever kill Elizabeth—which is why when he was found in her room with 'her' blood on his clothes I well-"

"What are you trying to say Dr. McKay?"

"What I'm saying," Rodney began. "Is that no matter how much had to drink he would NEVER kill Elizabeth."

"Why?"

Rodney pondered the question and then spoke the simple truth. "He loves her."

"I beg your pardon?"

"He loves her." Rodney repeated. "He always has- at least, I think he always has..." He shook his head. "But that's not the point. The point is that Sheppard remembers what happened to him and we know now that the blood of that young woman in the morgue is not our Elizabeth."

"So what do you propose that I do?"

"Let John go." Rodney stated simply. "Let him go under the pretence that he has to find the murderer of the real Jal G'dan. We know that your Minister of Peace was murdered three weeks ago and yet, we all saw him at the ball a couple of days ago. Tell your people that if John finds the real culprit you will let him go-"

"And what if he doesn't find the real culprit?"

Rodney was at a loss for words, he hadn't thought that far. He was about to suggest something when a deep voice interrupted from the doorway.

"If Sheppard doesn't find the real culprit then kill him." It was Ronan and he closed the door behind him as he entered the office.

"Are you crazy?" Rodney asked standing up. "We can't let them kill Shep."

"I know." Ronan agreed. "That's why you make it look like he was killed." He turned to Kellan and explained. "If we can't find Kolya, then make it look like we tried to flee and that Sheppard was killed in the process. That way, you keep face and our lives continue as normal."

"And what of Dr. Weir?" Kellan asked curiously. "If she truly is alive then-"

"Oh she's alive." Ronan interrupted, holding out a data disk. "I found this in the hallway leading to Elizabeth's room. It seems as though someone must have dropped it."

"Does it prove John's innocence?" Rodney asked, intrigued at Ronan's find.

"Oh it proves more than that."

Ronan then handed the disk over to Kellan who placed it on the monitor screen behind his desk. They all watched with utter horror and fascination as they saw Jal G'dan and three men sneak into Elizabeth's rooms followed closely by Elizabeth herself and John. Though there was no sound, they could vaguely see into her room and saw Jal G'dan morph into someone else. Then it was all over and the three men exited carrying Elizabeth followed by...

"Kolya." Rodney breathed starting at the screen. "Sheppard was telling the truth."

"You didn't believe him?" Ronan asked, turning to the scientist.

"I uh-"

"This sufficiently proves Colonel Sheppard's innocence." Kellan interrupted as he pulled a key from the drawer of his desk and handed it over to Ronan. "Take this key to our prison, and give it to the guard. It is the symbol for freedom in our society and it will let Colonel Sheppard go free."

"Free to find Elizabeth." Rodney muttered.

"Your people won't give us any trouble in the search?" Ronan asked as he pocketed the key.

"Anyone of our soldiers or security personal will be more than glad to help you."

And with that, Rodney and Ronan made their way down to the prison and let John out.

"Good work McKay," John thanked as he stepped out of the cell that had been his home for the past couple days.

"Are you sure that you're up to this?" Rodney asked, indicating to John's unkempt appearance.

"I'm sure." John answered with steely resolve. "That son of a bitch has Elizabeth and I am NOT going to let him get away with that."

* * *

A/N- Sorry for the long delay. I give you no excuses...just be prepared for another long wait 'cause this story is becoming a bugger to write. Thank to to Gingercake, JenniDinoRobot, lemons and wraith and HopelesslyEscaflowne for reviewing the last chapter and please take the time to review this one too. 


	22. Rescuing Elizabeth

**Chapter 22: Rescuing Elizabeth **

"Oh Doctor Weir," Kolya stated with a sickly grin. "You're never going to be quite the same again."

Elizabeth tried to back away, but one could only back away so far when they were tied to a chair. She watched in utter horror as Kolya came towards her with a needle looking contraption and she just had a horrible sinking feeling that she was going to die, without ever being able to tell John how she really felt about him.

...

John knew that Kolya was smart, but even he was surprised how easy it had been to find them. Ronan, using his excellent tracking skills was able to retrace the steps that Kolya took to take Elizabeth away from her room and that path led them to the gate. "Oh this is just brilliant," Rodney muttered as he looked disparagingly towards the DHD, "It's going to be like looking through a needle in a haystack to try and get her back."

"Think positively Rodney," John stated firmly, though he himself had to do some serious mental work to ensure that he didn't spin off into a panic. "We'll find her."

"Oh really?" asked Rodney. "How? I can pull the DHD command crystal but that's more than fifty gate addresses and—"

"—and I think that we should check out that house," Ronan interrupted, pointing down the lane way a little to where a small cottage stood. "Someone there might have seen something."

...

"I don't know what use I can be to you," said Elara, the lady of the house. "I saw no such woman being taken through the gate, though I do remember her coming through."

"Please," John begged. "I know that you've said that you were asleep at the time but was there anyone else in this home at the time, who might have been awake and who might have seen something?"

Elara sighed. "I am sorry," she apologized as she stood up. "But there was no one."

"Mama," came a quiet voice and four pairs of eyes went to the corner where Elara's daughter was standing.

"Hush Giana," the mother stated. "Hold your tongue."

"Giana?" asked John as he stood up, doing his best to not look imposing. "Can you help us? Did you see something."

Giana looked to her mom and shook her head. "I am sorry Mama, but I have to help them," the girl paused and turned back to John. "Yes," she answered. "I can help you, for I saw the woman you described being taken through the ring."

"I don't suppose that you know the symbols that were lit up?" asked Rodney.

The girl nodded.

"Please," John began as he extended his hand to Giana. "Show us."

...

Elizabeth looked around and saw that she was alone. She didn't know what was going on, but there was a nagging feeling that what she was seeing, wasn't exactly what she was supposed to be seeing. _I am surprised,_ came the voice of Kolya in her head. _You are quite strong. They will need more time to turn you._ And that's when Elizabeth knew what was going on. She had been infected by nanites, just as she had been when she had been infected by Liam.

"You're not going to get anymore time Kolya," she stated aloud, knowing exactly what she needed to do and a gate materialized out of no where. "I'm going back to the real world."

...

Elizabeth opened her eyes just in time to see Kolya being shot by John Sheppard. The replicator version of their enemy fell to the ground. "And this time," John began in a seething tone. "Stay dead."

"John," Elizabeth warned as she stood up, watching as Kolya's body began twitching back to life. "He's a replicator. He's going to..."

What happened next was a little bit of a blur. Kolya attacked John, and the two of them struggled. Ronan tried to help but Kolya threw him against the wall so hard that when he fell, he stayed down. Rodney raced to Elizabeth's side. "Don't touch me," she stated as she backed away from him.

"Elizabeth?"

"I'm infected again," she stated as she backed up against a wall.

"You're what?"

"Never mind about me Rodney," Elizabeth ordered. "Help John."

Rodney nodded and began digging around in his pack.

"A little help would be nice Mckay," came John's grunt.

"I know," Rodney shouted back as his face lit up.

Elizabeth watched as Rodney pointed a gun at John. "No!" she began to cry out but instead of a bullet, or even a stun pulse, a different sort of energy came out of the gun and Kolya dissolved into little pieces. "Rodney?" she asked as she turned to face the scientist. "What was that?"

"Oh this?" Rodney asked looking rather pleased with himself. "Well this is our new ARG, came from the SGC earlier this week and well, I figured that one could never be too prepared."

"No," John agreed as he got to his feet. "You can't," he paused glanced at Elizabeth for only a moment before turning to Rodney. "Go help Ronan."

Rodney nodded and went over to the Stateatan who was beginning to come around. John moved closer to Elizabeth. "Please," she began, trying to back up even further.

"I know," he stated with a heavy sigh. "I heard."

"I'm sorry," she apologized. "But Kolya..."

"That bastard is dead now," John interrupted. "He can't hurt us anymore..." he paused and looked as Rodney helped Ronan to his feet. "Come on," he continued. "We should get back to Atlantis."

...

After being cleared by Keller and Carson who deduced that the nanites that were once again floating in her blood stream were inert, Elizabeth found herself on her balcony with a cup of coffee with John at her side. They were standing in silence, listening to the sound of the waver before John finally spoke up. "I knew that you weren't dead."

Elizabeth turned to look at him. "How."

"Well I knew that I didn't kill you."

"How?" she asked again. "Kolya,"

"He messed with my memory," John interjected. "And believe me it was really close for a while, but I still knew that there was no way that I could kill you."

"But if you had no memory,"

"I know that it doesn't make sense,"

"No," Elizabeth interjected as she put the coffee down on the railing. "It does."

"It does what?' asked John.

"Make sense," she continued. "I knew that you would come for me."

"Even though Kolya said that I was probably dead?'

Elizabeth nodded. "I'm sorry by the way,"

"For what?"

"For getting swept away."

John shrugged his shoulders. "Right that."

"You told me that he was trouble," Elizabeth stated. "You were right."

"My instincts are usually right," John stated.

Elizabeth smiled. "Your spidey sense."

He nodded. "Yeah that too."

They lapsed into silence while Elizabeth finished her coffee, and when she was done she turned towards John at the same moment he turned towards her. "You go first," he insisted, and Elizabeth sighed

"I have a question to ask you,"

"And what's that?"

"Why are we always the targets?"

John sighed. "Burden of command I guess."

"But," Elizabeth began, stopping only momentarily to choose her words.

"But what?" asked John.

"But doesn't it seem to be more than that."

"I don't know what you mean."

Elizabeth sighed. "We're always the targets, for each other."

John nodded. "I have noticed that. But it's bound to stop sooner or later."

"You really think so?"

"Well for one thing, Kolya's dead."

Elizabeth smiled. "You sure about that?"

John nodded. "I don't think that he can come back from being disintegrated."

"Yeah but, if it's not him... it's going to be someone else."

"Elizabeth," John began in a quiet voice. "Since when have you been a pessimist?"

"Since I've come here," she answered with another heavy sigh. "I've seen too much death."

"Elizabeth,"

"I"m sorry," she apologized. "But it feels as though we can't get anything right lately."

"We'll find our footing again," he insisted. "Eventually."

"I don't know if I can last that long,"

John reached out and took her hand. "I'll help you."

Elizabeth glanced to his hand and then his face. "Promise?" she finally asked.

John nodded knowing that he would do anything and be anyone for the woman standing before him. "I promise, just so long as you promise me something."

Elizabeth smiled. "And what's that?"

"Promise me that I won't lose you..."

Elizabeth searched his eyes, there was so much longing and desire there that she wasn't quite ready to fall into and so she did what she thought was best. She nodded her head and placed her hand on top of his. "I swear that you won't."

_Author's Note: Hi all, no I'm not dead. I never thought that I'd fall back into this fandom, but I'm not leaving any story left unfinished anymore and I figured that it was high time to finish this little gem. I do hope that you enjoyed this chapter, even though it's been a long time coming and I hope that you'll leave a review. _


	23. Change in Command

**Chapter 23: Change of Command **

Elizabeth had no idea, but she was not going to be able to keep her promise. After getting a communique from Stargate Command, she learned that she was being replaced in favour of a military commander who would be able to ensure that the military mission and well being of Atlantis was being executed to the max. She was given twelve hours to pack and in that time she avoided everyone. Her quarters were first, and her office last. She knew that the people in the command centre were talking about her but she had no idea what was being said.

"Sheppard," Rodney began as he chased John up the steps to the main area of the gate room. "What do you think you're doing."

"I almost lost her once," John stated angrily, not caring who was listening. "I'm not going to lose her again."

"You're not losing Elizabeth," Rodney tried to explain. "She's just being recalled."

"She won't be here."

"You can't control that."

"Oh yeah?" asked John as he stormed towards her office. "Elizabeth?"

"Yes?" she asked as she looked up, noticing with some interest that John was standing in her doorway while Rodney was snapping at the people in the control room to get back to work. "Can I help you?" she continued, trying to be as professional as possible.

"Yeah," he continued as he stepped into her office and sat down in his usual spot. "You can help me by not leaving."

Elizabeth sighed. "I don't have a choice."

"You always have a choice."

"I can't defy an order."

"They can't make you go through the gate," John pointed out.

"They'd send marines to drag me through,"

"They'd have to get through me first." John muttered.

"Oh John," she whispered. "It's not... you can't—"

"Atlantis can't lose you."

Elizabeth shook her head. "Colonel Carter will be an excellent commander," she argued. "She knows how to handle military situations a lot better than I do."

"And what about me?" asked John. "I could command."

"You after my chair John?"

"All I'm saying is..."

Elizabeth laughed, though it was strained. "I know what you mean. But the decision has already been made. Colonel Carter will need you to give her the Pegasus intel. She's walking into a mine field here John what with the Wraith, the Asurand and—"

"I can't lose you," John blurted out, surprising them both. "You... you promised."

Elizabeth sighed and leaned back in her chair. "I know. But there's absolutely nothing that I can do. I'm employed by the IOA. I've been dodging this bullet for a while and to be honest... I can't fight anymore."

"Don't you want to stay?"

"You know I do," Elizabeth assured. "Don't you?"

John nodded. "I do it's just, I'm not used to seeing you give up."

"It's not like I'm giving up,"

"I understand that you have a lot to do and—"

"—John," she interjected, knowing that she had to say something to stop his babbling. "The only thing that I'm going back to is my mother and my teaching job," Elizabeth explained watching as John leaned back in his chair. "You have to know that there's no where in two galaxies that I'd rather be than here with you..." she paused and watched the flicker of surprise in John's eyes. "And the whole team," she amended feeling rather self conscious. "Atlantis is my home."

"Then do what you want."

"What I want isn't up for discussion," Elizabeth argued. "What I want doesn't matter."

"It matters to m— to all of us here," John assured, changing his sentence halfway through.

"I know, and I thank you... all of you for that," she stated, pausing a moment to look out int the control room. "But it's not like I'm never going to see you guys again. Technically I'm only a step away. You could always take some leave on Earth, god knows that you've got enough of it saved up."

John laughed, deciding to sideswipe the fact that she was all but formally asking him out on a date. "What are the chances that I'd actually be able to use it?"

Elizabeth laughed too. "True. It seems as though there's a crisis here every couple days."

John nodded. "And there is the flight back."

"The midway station is going to be completed soon," Elizabeth pointed out. "It would just be a step back to Atlantis."

"True," John stated with a sigh, knowing that there was nothing that he could do or say to change her mind.

There was one thing that John knew that he could say that would change things between them, but he wasn't ready. He had been holding off to say it for so long, he figured that a little longer wouldn't hurt. She was right after all. They would only be a step away from each other technically, and he wouldn't want to ruin anything by saying something in the heat of the moment that would have Elizabeth leaving Atlantis with the feeling like she owed him, or rather them something.

"I guess that you've got to finish packing?" he continued, dropping his gaze to the boxes that littered the floor around her desk.

Elizabeth nodded. "Yeah."

"Then uh, I'll see you at the gate?"

Elizabeth nodded again. "Yeah. You'll see me at the gate."

John stood up and made his way to the door before pausing. "Do you, do you want some help?"

"Oh yes," Elizabeth assured with a smile. "That would be great."

Their final moment on Atlantis just flew by. The orders had been given and Elizabeth's stuff had already been shipped through the gate. She had just given her last all-call goodbye and it was all that Elizabeth could do to keep her tears at bay. It was a task that proved to be even more difficult when John and his team minus Teyla of course, came up to her.

"I uh, just wanted to thank you," Ronan began as he stepped forward. "Thank you for letting me stay."

Elizabeth shook her head. "No need to thank me."

"Still," he continued. "It's been really nice having a home and, I owe a little of that to you."

"You're welcome."

Ronan and Elizabeth stood there awkwardly before Elizabeth made the first move and hugged the large Stateatan. "Goodbye Ronan."

"Goodbye Doctor Weir."

Ronan and Elizabeth pulled away and Elizabeth turned to Rodney. "Dear Rodney," she began with a smile. "It sure has been a journey."

"I want you to know that I've lodged a formal complaint with the IOA," Rodney stated in a nervous tone. "And I've even sent them bits of my book..." he paused and noticed the look on Elizabeth's face. "Oh don't worry, nothing of a personal nature but I uh...I just thought that they should know from me what a great leader you've been and well, we're all going to, that is to say..."

"I'm going to miss you to Rodney," Elizabeth stated as she gave her long time friend a hug.

"Goodbye Elizabeth," he stated as he pulled away. He and Ronan then left the gate area to watch from the control room giving Elizabeth and John the space to say their goodbyes alone.

Elizabeth sighed. "Guess this is it,"

"Guess it is,"

Elizabeth blinked back the tears that were prickling in her eyes. "Goodbye then?"

John nodded. "For now. When I get Colonel Carter to approve some leave I'll uh, come visit you."

Elizabeth smiled. "I'd like that."

They stood in silence before they both reached forward at the same time to hug each other.

"Oh I'm going to miss you,"

"I'm going to miss you too Elizabeth." John agreed. "It's not going to be the same with out you."

"You'll manage."

"That's not the point,"

"Then what is?" asked Elizabeth.

"You're the only one who's believed in me enough to give me a second chance," John stated as he pulled back to look at Elizabeth. "In the process you've become a dear friend and I uh—" he paused, losing the nerve to say what he so wanted to say. "—I don't know what I'm going to do without you."

Elizabeth choked back a little sob and tried to put on a smile for John's sake. "The feelings mutual..." she whispered as she stared longingly into John's face. "Now I've got to get out of here before I lose my nerve," she continued as she took a step back. Elizabeth put on her brave face and gave a smile and a wave to all the people who had gathered to see her off. "Goodbye everyone," she stated loudly enough for them all to here. "Stay safe. I'll miss you all."

And with that said, Elizabeth turned and walked towards the gate. She paused momentarily to glance back at John and he was surprised to see that she stepped through with a single tear rolling down her cheek.

...

John didn't return to the gateroom until he heard that Colonel Samantha Carter was moving into her new office and wanted to meet her second in command. He came barging in, determined to give his new boss a piece of his mind. "Welcome to Atlantis Colonel," he stated as he walked through the door. "Now I just want to say—"

"Wait," Sam interrupted. "Let me have my say first. I know that you don't want me here and Colonel Sheppard you should know that I don't want to be here either. I had a life back on Earth. I had friends and a family and after we defeated the Ori I got promoted. The promotion also gave me this post and while I could have turned it down, I didn't."

"May I ask why?"

"Because I knew what was going on here," Sam stated. "You may find it hard to believe but since you regained contact with us I've been corresponding with Rodney and he's kept me informed. I've known about everything and I knew that if I didn't step up the IOA would have chosen instead and it would have been a disaster."

"Disaster?"

"I'm on your side Colonel," Sam assured. "The brain from Washington that the IOA was considering for this position would not have been so understanding about the way things are done around here."

"Colonel Carter,"

"Sheppard I am not your enemy," Sam interrupted. "I can't have you being mine. I need your support. You've been the leader of the military here for almost four years and you've got the support of the scientists. You're going to have to help me."

"I know, it's just that—"

Sam nodded. "I have some very big shoes to fill here. Doctor Weir was very much loved and believe me, McKay has already reminded me about that about a dozen times already. She won't be forgotten."

"No," John agreed. "She won't."

"So what do you say?" Sam asked. "Truce?"

John sighed and nodded. All thoughts of giving Samantha Carter a piece of his mind were forgotten because everything that he had said she had touched on in one way or another. There was nothing that he could do about the current situation so he was damn sure to make sure that things ran as smoothly as possible. Elizabeth would expect nothing less. "Truce Colonel."

"Sheppard" Sam stated. "While military protocol demands that you call me by rank, while we're working together you're going to have to call me by my name."

"Samantha?"

Sam shook her head. "Sam's fine."

"Alright then," John agreed. "And Sam?"

"Yes Sheppard?"

"Congratulations."

"For what?" she asked curiously.

"For the promotion,"

Sam smiled. "Thanks."


	24. Enemy at the Gate

**Chapter 24: Enemy at the Gate **

Elizabeth knew that returning home was going to be hard. The experience with the Ancients taking their city back had proved that to her and she was determined to keep it together this time round, only she was the only one going through the separation. All her friends, her surrogate family, they were a galaxy away. Elizabeth tried to settle into a normal routine, but everything felt dull to her. The brightness and brilliance of the Pegasus galaxy had altered her perception of life and even though she knew that she was ten times safer on Earth than Atlantis, every bone in her body was aching to return.

Days turned into weeks and weeks turned into months and the months moved forward. She was able to stay in semi - consistent contact with John via e-mails that were forwarded from the SGC but he was never able to arrange time to visit. There was one instance, where he and Rodney returned to save Rodney's sister and that's when she was finally able to hear his voice again. "John?" she asked in shock as she clutched the phone to her ear. "Is it really you?"

"Yes it is," he assured his voice sounding strained. "But I don't have much time."

"What are you doing here on Earth?" she asked. "Are you coming to visit."

"No and I'm sorry," he apologized. John proceeded to tell her all that had happened and Elizabeth knew that he was already taking a great risk by calling her. He had been recalled to Earth to do a job and now that the job was done he had only a little while before he would be sent back to the Pegasus Galaxy.

"So why are you calling me?" she asked as he finished his story.

"I couldn't leave Earth without talking to you," John answered. "I miss you."

Elizabeth smiled, though that wasn't exactly what she had wanted to hear. "I miss you too," she replied and though she figured that John had no idea the subtext of her sentence, it made her heart hurt just a little less being able to say that. Their conversation ended after that and Elizabeth fell back into what she considered to be the boring routine of life.

Nearly eight months to the day that she had been recalled to Earth, Elizabeth answered her door to two men dressed in navy blues at her door. "Excuse me?" asked Elizabeth. "Can I help you?"

"Yes ma'am," said the one on the left.

"We have orders from General Landry," the one of the right began.

"Landry?" asked Elizabeth her eyes going wide. "What for?"

"You are to come with us to Cheyanne mountain."

How could Elizabeth say no to an order that she had been dreaming about for so long.

...

"General Landry," Elizabeth began the moment she was allowed into his office. "What's going on with my people."

Landry sighed. "They're not your people Elizabeth."

"I led them for three years General," she stated angrily. "They will always be my people."

Landry sighed. "I suppose in your mind they will be."

"There are," Elizabeth insisted. "Now tell me what's going on. I'm...worried about them."

"You have a right to be worried," Landry stated. "They're in trouble?"

"Trouble?" asked Elizabeth. "What kind of trouble?"

"They weren't very specific but it seems as though the negotiations with the Asurans have—"

"They tried negotiating with the Asurans?" asked Elizabeth. "Who did the negotiating."

"Colonel Carter has handled most of the communications with the Asurans,"

"I'm sorry," Elizabeth interjected again. "And with all due respect to the woman who has saved Earth on more than one occasion, but was she crazy?"

"Excuse me?"

"You can't really tell me that she didn't know that negotiating with the Asurans would be a disaster," Elizabeth explained. "I mean not only does she have experience with the Milky Way replicators but after what happened last time—"

"Elizabeth it isn't your place,"

"Of course it's my place," she snapped. "They're my people. My friends, the people I..." Elizabeth paused and shook her head. "When do I leave General?"

"Excuse me?"

"Why else would you have brought me here," she pointed out.

"I—"

"You know that I'm the best damn negotiator in two galaxies," Elizabeth snapped. "Now, my family needs me. So you need to tell me when I'm walking through that damn gate."

Landry sighed. "You'll be leaving in one hour."

...

John paced nervously along the balcony that overlooked the Stargate arrival area.. "What time is it Rodney?" he asked, looking over his shoulder. He had been told only an hour ago that because of the deteriorating negotiations and near all out war with the Asurans, Elizabeth Weir would finally be returning to Atlantis.

"She'll be here soon," Rodney stated and the moment that he did, the symbols on the stargate activated. "We're getting an IDC," he continued as soon as the gate was active. "It's from the SGC. I'm lowering the shield."

The moment the shield was lowered, John was heading down the stairs and he just reached the bottom the moment that Elizabeth stepped through. The eight months had been good to her he decided as he took her apperance in. She looked healthy and well rested. Her hair reached to the middle of her back and it was loose and swayed as she walked.

She stopped the moment that she saw John. Their eyes locked and time seemed to stand still. It was only broken by Rodney's loud and annoying voice from the balcony. "Elizabeth!" he called out, causing her eyes to go to him. "Welcome home."

Elizabeth smiled. "Thank you Rodney," she replied. "It seems as though you've kept our home in one piece."

"Yes," Rodney answered. "Well I've done my best," he paused and tapped the communicator in his ear. "Uh, Carter wants senior staff and you in the briefing room like now."

"Thank you Rodney," Elizabeth called back. "We'll be there in a moment."

Rodney nodded and left the balcony area. Elizabeth turned her attention back to John, who seemed to be stunned beyond belief. "You're here," he stated in a softly as though he didn't quite believe it.

Elizabeth nodded. "I heard that you needed a negotiator,"

John said nothing, he merely closed the small distance between them and drew her into a huge hug, the very same way that she had done during the first seige of Atlantis by the Wraith. Only this time the hug conveyed so much more. They just held onto each other and it wasn't until Elizabeth could hear Carter's voice coming from John's earpiece that she pulled away.

"We should go," she stated as she pulled away.

"I can't believe that you're back," he stated once again.

"I know," Elizabeth agreed, trying not to let her heart flutter too much due to his hands which remained on her shoulders. "Eight months is a long time..." she paused and looked up at the command area. "We really should get to the briefing room now."

"Yes," John agreed. "We should."

...

"Teyla," Elizabeth stated as soon as she entered the briefing room. "It's so good to see you."

"Doctor Weir it is good to see you too."

Elizabeth glanced down at Teyla's stomach. "What—?"

"The...thing could not be brought to full term." Telya answered, choosing her words very carefully. "It died as I gave birth to it."

"Oh Telya," Elizabeth sighed. "I am sorry."

"Please," Sam stated loudly. "Take your seats."

"Of course," Elizabeth stated with a nod after giving Teyla a sympathetic look.

"I've called you all here to discuss an important matter," Sam began as Elizabeth and John took their seats with Rodney, Zelenka and Ronan already seated. "The Asurans are on their way to Atlantis."

"Excuse me?" asked Rodney. "What makes you say that?"

"I just decoded that data Rodney," Zelenka answered. "I'm sorry,"

"No need to be sorry Radek," Elizabeth interjected. "You found them before they got here."

"Yes," Sam agreed through she gave Elizabeth a warning look. "We have four days."

"Four days," John muttered as his mind spun. "Enough to evacuate non-essential personal back to Earth. Including you Elizabeth."

"No," Elizabeth stated. "I'm not going anywhere."

"Elizabeth," John began in a no nonsense tone. "It's the Asurans."

"I know who they are John," she argued. "But I'm not going."

"Elizabeth needs to stay here," Sam interjected. "We'll probably need her to buy us some time."

"Time?" asked Ronan. "To do what?"

"To get our ZPMs online to pilot Atlantis out of here."

"How many do you have now?" asked Elizabeth.

"Well we have the one that Carson brought," Rodney stated. "And the two that we got from the Telarians."

Rodney shook his head. "They're not entirely compatible."

"Compatible or not," Sam ordered. "You're to get them working. I want Atlantis to fly."

...

The next three days were buzzing with movement as people packed and bolted down the proverbial hatches. John was busy getting personnel in order and Elizabeth was in almost constant communication with their Wraith allies. Todd and his band of brothers had been contacted and agreed that if Atlantis was to fall at the hands of the Asurans then the Pegasus Galaxy was doomed. And so in order for Atlantis to earn their allegiance, the Wraith demanded that they be given the formula to the syrum that would change the Wraith to humans and Sam agreed.

Things were so busy that Elizabeth and John could barely say two words to each other and what time they were in each others company, there were always others around. Elizabeth wanted to confront John for basically demanding her to run away from her home— again. And John wanted to all but through Elizabeth through the gate to ensure that she wasn't in harms way.

It was the morning of the attack, Rodney said that he was close to getting the three ZPMs online and despite the fact that he had had practically no sleep in the past seventy two hours, they were all willing to believe him. It was on that morning, that John finally found a quiet moment to talk to Elizabeth. She was standing on their balcony, looking out into the sky.

"You know it's not too late you know," he stated as he came to stand beside her.

"I've missed this place so much," Elizabeth said, seeming to ignore his comment.

"I'm sure I could convince Carter to let you go through the gate."

"Never could get used to sleeping without the sound of waves."

"I don't want you to get hurt Elizabeth,"

Elizabeth turned for the first time to look at her former second in command. "What did you say?"

"Atlantis is dangerous."

"Earth is dangerous," she countered. "I'm just as likely to die there than here."

"There's more that can kill you here."

"Well maybe I don't care.'

"Maybe I do."

"What gives you the right to decide where I'll be safe?" asked Elizabeth angrily.

"What gives you the right to come waltzing back here?"

"What?" asked Elizabeth, taken aback by his comment.

"Why did you come back?"

Elizabeth shook her head, feeling gutted. "This is my home,"

"You were born on Earth."

"You know what I mean," she snapped.

"And?" John asked.

"And I was asked to do a job,"

"That you weren't needed for."

"I got the Wraith to join us," she pointed out. "Didn't I?"

John could say nothing to that.

"John," she began quietly. "What's gotten into you."

"Nothing's wrong," he lied.

"Tell me," Elizabeth insisted. "Please."

"Leave it alone Elizabeth."

"John,"

"I said no."

"John."

"Alright!" he exclaimed slamming his hands down on the railing. "Alright. I'm scared."

Of all the things she expected to hear, that wasn't one of them. "I think we're all scared."

John shook his head. "I know that but this is a different kind of scared Elizabeth. This is a breath taking, soul wrenching, gut twisting kind of scared."

"Doesn't sound good."

John shook his head. "It's not."

"What... what are you scared of?" she asked quietly, almost afraid to hear the answer.

"You," he answered truthfully.

"Me?' asked Elizabeth in surprise.

"I'm scared of losing you," he explained. "I can't lose you."

"Who says that you will?" asked Elizabeth sympathetically.

"Last time we went up against the Asurans,"

"I know," Elizabeth interrupted, trying to suppress the memory. "I nearly died."

"And I nearly died along with you," John whispered. "I can't go through that again."

"You won't," she promised. "I swear to you that nothing like that will happen again."

John shook his head. "You can't make that promise."

"No," Elizabeth agreed. "But you can't promise me the same thing either, even though I want—"

"You want what?" asked John turning to Elizabeth. But instead of her smiling or even concerned face, he was horrified to see that she was doubling over in silent pain. "John to Beckett. Come in Beckett!"

_What is it lad?_ Asked Carson through communications link.

"It's Elizabeth," John stated as he reached out to stop her from falling over. "She's in trouble."

_Author's Note: Hey folks. This is the second to last chapter. I've got one more before this story is offically done. I hope that you take the time to review because I love hearing what you think. Thanks to Mrs. Rosemary Weir for reviewing chapter twenty three._


	25. This Mortal Coil Unwinds

**Chapter 25: The Mortal Coil Unwinds **

As Elizabeth was wheeled into the infirmary, the Asurans arrived. It was the same moment that Rodney finished adapting the two ZPM's bringing the city practically to full power. An explosion sounded, but the city was not rocked. "Oh no," Keller muttered as she looked around. "I guess our guests are here."

"Lad," Carson began as he started to look Elizabeth over. "What happened."

"We were arguing and—"

"Sheppard," Sam's voice sounded in his ear. "I need you in the chair."

"—and what?" asked Carson.

"And nothing," John finished. "That's all I know. Carson, take good care of her."

"Go lad," Carson stated, not needing to say anything more. Carson watched as John took one last look at Elizabeth before he disappeared out of the infirmary.

...

"Carter," Sheppard began as he sat down. "I'm here."

"Good," she replied via the communication system as another explosion impacted the shield. "See if you can't give those jerks a piece of our mind."

"Aye ma'am."

...

It didn't take much to push the Asurans back. A few well placed drones from Sheppard had the Asurans turning and fleeing. It was a miracle to all those left on Atlantis, especially considering the Asurans had made some modifications to their own drones which allowed one of them to get through the shield and impact the city. "Is everyone alright?" John asked, splitting focus for a moment.

_Yes,_ came Sam's voice in his ear. _It hit an empty part of the city._

With that knowledge John had been able to finish the job and when he was given the all clear that the Asurans were fleeing he allowed himself to think about Elizabeth and what was happening to her in the infirmary.

"So?" he asked Carson just a few feet from Elizabeth's bed. "What's going on?"

"You are aware that she was reinfected by nanites?"

John nodded. "Yes."

"Well the Asurans activated them."

"Activated them?" asked John. "How?"

"From orbit," Rodney answered. "I think they wanted to use her as a weapon."

"Weapon?" asked Sam. "What kind of weapon?"

"We think that they wanted her to destroy Atlantis from the inside out," Rodney explained.

"Aye," Carson agreed. "But the lass has had experience with these buggers before and she was able to fight them off."

"Have you tried an EMP?" John asked, remembering the last time they were in this position.

Rodney shook his head. "We can't. It'll kill her."

"How can it when it worked the last time?" Teyla asked.

"This time the nannites have been replacing her own cells with theirs," Carson explained. "Every moment she is becoming more and more like them."

"So what can we do?" asked Ronan.

"We can put her in the machine," John stated. "Like we did last time."

Carson shook his head. "My blood samples have been destroyed."

"Alright," Sam began, stopping John from talking. "We need a new plan, let's see what we can come up with."

...

As every hour passed Elizabeth became less and less herself. Rodney worked as hard as he could, but even with Zelenka's help, there was nothing that he could come up with. Carson and Keller worked as hard as they could to slow the progress of the nanites but they too were met with little success. And as for John, well he kept an ever constant vigil at Elizabeth's side.

"John?" asked Sam as she came to see how her second in command was doing.

"She hasn't woken up," he stated in a broken whisper.

"That's probably for the best."

John shook his head. "We were arguing,"

"Sorry?" she asked.

"Before she..." John trailed off, hardly able to say what had happened to her. "We argued."

"About?"

"It doesn't matter."

"John—"

"It doesn't matter now."

Sam sighed. "We can always put her in the machine."

"But the blood samples have been destroyed," John pointed out. "She'd die."

"She might ascend," Sam answered. "There's a difference."

"Doesn't the SGC have any samples on file?"

Sam shook her head. "They don't."

"How about anywhere on Earth. There has to be something."

"There probably is something," Sam agreed. "But it would take too much time."

"We can't lose her,"

Sam nodded. "I know."

"No!" John exclaimed as he turned away from Sam. "I can't lose her."

"John—"

"Dammit Sam," he cursed. "I love her."

"John?" she asked, surprised yet not surprised at the same time.

"I love her," he repeated, his voice broken. "And now it's too late."

Sam sighed, an eerie feeling of deja vu washing over her. "Why do we wait to tell people how we really feel?"

"What?" he asked, unable to hear her whisper.

Sam shook her head. "Nothing. I just... I know what you're going through right now."

John nodded. He had read Sam's SGC file and her mission reports. He knew how she had lost people that she had cared about and yet she had persevered. John however wasn't so sure how he would be able to live knowing that his Elizabeth was dead.

...

"Lad are you sure?" asked Carson.

John nodded. "We have to try," he stated after coming to a startling realization. If the machine worked to heal her then it would buy them more time before she ascended and if they couldn't figure it out in time at least she would be ascended and not dead. And so, Carson with the help of Ronan placed Elizabeth on the bed of the machine and Zelenka brought the thing to life.

Like before, a beam of light encircled Elizabeth and when it vanished, she opened her eyes. "What," she began in a hushed whisper as John helped her to her feet. "What happened?"

They had all decided that John should be the one to explain to her what had happened but for John, he found that it was the hardest thing that he had ever had to say. "So we defeated the Asurans?" she asked as they walked along the balconies of Atlantis.

John nodded. "Yeah. They didn't like us fighting back."

Elizabeth smiled. "I"m sorry to have missed the battle."

"You have nothing to be sorry for."

"John?" she asked. "What happened to me?"

"Elizabeth you—" he sighed. "You were dying."

"I'm not dead."

"The nanites were turning you into one of them," he explained. "You would have been—"

"—entirely Asuran," she finished. "Not a pleasant thought. But I'm all human now right?"

John nodded. "You are except,"

"Except that I'm changing," she stated. Since she had woken up, Elizabeth had felt like something was off and now it all made sense. "I'm ascending."

John nodded. "Yes you are."

He stopped and so did Elizabeth. "This was your choice?" she asked.

"To buy us more time."

"John—"

"Don't you dare say that it wasn't my right," he argued. "I couldn't lose you."

"John," she stated more firmly, her voice quavering just a little. "You might lose me anyways."

He shook his head. "I can't think like that."

"Why not?" she asked.

John said nothing.

"John?" she asked, pressing for an answer. "Why not."

But John couldn't tell her. It wouldn't be fair to her or to him and so he stayed silent. The hours counted down, neither Rodney nor Radek nor Carson and Keller could find a way to save Elizabeth and so after saying goodbye to her friends and family, Elizabeth Weir, ascended.

...

It was days after her memorial. He was standing on their balcony. The control room was behind him and although the doors were closed he knew that everyone there was in quiet contemplation. To say that the last few months had been a roller coaster would be a gross understatement. It started with something that was border-line immoral, and ended with something that could only be described as horribly unfair and wicked. And now, as he stood in the dying light of their new home, John Sheppard couldn't help but wonder if Elizabeth hadn't been right all along.

'If I had only listened to her…' John thought despairingly to himself. '…if I had only tried to convince Commander Ellis that going ahead with the first strike wasn't a good idea! If only…'

"You shouldn't blame yourself John…"

Her voice was soft as it whispered in his ear and John looked to his left and saw her standing there. Elizabeth was standing before him in a plain white gown, her hair flowing around her shoulders and her hazel eyes wide and full of life. All around her a white aura glowed and John knew that he was looking at her ascended form.

"-Lizabeth-!" He breathed out taking a halted step towards her.

"I'm here John." She answered quietly, her voice calm and sure. "I had to let you know that I was alright."

"So are you back?" He asked curiously, the shock of seeing her wearing off as he thought back to a half-forgotten conversation. "Or are you-"

"I am an ascended being now John." She explained apologetically. "I know what I said but- I can do more like this."

"Dr. Jackson thought so too." John pointed out, his brow furrowed. "And look where that got him."

"Yes." Elizabeth agreed with a small laugh as she clasped her hands in front of her and cast her gaze down to them. "I have been hearing stories about how us mortals from Earth have a very strange way of looking at things- how we rock the boat to much."

"But you won't-" John stated knowingly, causing Elizabeth to catch his eye. "-never a rash decision when it comes to you right?"

"My decision to get where I am now was somewhat rash…" Elizabeth admitted with a sigh as she took a step towards John. "…but at the time, it was the only way that I could think of to save you-all of you-"

"And yourself," John added softly, taking another step towards her so now they were standing toe to toe. "-you had to save yourself."

"John," Elizabeth began with a sigh, shaking her head. "-Teyla once told me that you would do anything for any member of your team. Did you think that you were alone in that conviction?"

"Well I-er-"

"You have defended and protected me too many times to count John," Elizabeth paused and laughed at a memory before continuing. "-you even defended my honour once." Elizabeth sighed and looked out to their new sea-green ocean, placing her hands upon the railing of the balcony. "But you have to know that while you may be willing to lay down your life for any of us, we are willing to lay down our life for you."

"I just wish that it hadn't been you." John stated suddenly catching Elizabeth's gaze and her hand as it rested on the railing. "I have so many things to say to you…"

"I have so many things to say to you too John," Elizabeth agreed, looking into his mournful eyes, knowing that she was projecting the same loss. "-but my time is up-"

"You could always come back you know…" He pointed out hopefully, taking her hand and squeezing it- inwardly shocked that she was solid. "You could always retake human form..."

"I made a commitment." Elizabeth stated firmly, echoing her words of so long ago. "And besides," She continued, pulling her hand away and taking a step back. "-it doesn't seem right to just ascend to fix a problem and then de-ascend for my own gain…"

"But it wouldn't be for just your own gain!" John exclaimed, his frustration mounting slightly. "You'd be returning to the place that you belong! You'd be returning to the position that you committed yourself to three years ago!" John sighed and let his tense shoulders slump. "You'd be returning to the people whom you befriended, who care about you, who l- love you."

"Oh John," Elizabeth sighed, her heart breaking at his last words. "If I only could-"

"Just promise me one thing," John interrupted, taking both her hands into his own; an intimate gesture that not only shocked Elizabeth but John as well.

"Anything…." Elizabeth agreed, squeezing John's hands as tight as she could.

"Promise me that I'll see you again one day."

"One day." Elizabeth promised with a nod and a smile as she kept a tight hold of John's hands even as she began to turn into white light. "One day we will meet again."

And with that Elizabeth was gone, leaving John standing alone on the balcony wondering if what he had just experienced was real or not. A part of him confirmed to himself that he had indeed seen Elizabeth and that she had promised him that one day they would meet again.

"I'll hold you to that Elizabeth." John whispered softly turning from the balcony and heading into the control room. "I'll hold you to that…"

And as he left, he could hear the waves of the sea crashing against the piers of Atlantis and interspersed with them he could have sworn that he had heard her sweet laughter and a promise in response.

"_We will meet again John, I swear that we will..."_

_

* * *

_Authors Note: So things have come around full circle. We're back where we started and yeah, this is a rather sadish ending, but since when have I left sad endings for my beloved sparky ship? You're just going to have to read the epilogue to find out what happens. :D_  
_


	26. Epilogue: Love Everlasting

**Epilogue: Love Everlasting **

Atlantis had returned to its original home and the Atlantis team, including their new leader Richard Woosley were all standing on the balcony overlooking a familiar sight. One by one they all turned and left leaving John there alone. "Well," he murmured with a quiet sigh. "Atlantis is home."

"Yes," came a familiar voice. "And so am I."

John turned to see Elizabeth, his beloved Elizabeth standing before him with a smile.

"You—" he muttered hardly able to believe what he was seeing. "You came back."

"Of course I did," she replied. "I had to."

John shook his head. "This is a dream."

"No," she assured. "It's no dream."

"But—"

"I had a promise to keep," Elizabeth explained. "I'm keeping it." John smiled and moved towards Elizabeth. Before she could say or do anything more he took her into his arms and kissed her. Elizabeth, while being shocked for the first couple seconds passionately returned his kiss and when they finally pulled apart she could do nothing but smile too.

"I love you," he whispered, knowing that it was high time for him to tell Elizabeth what sh had wanted to tell her so long.

Elizabeth kissed him and when she pulled away she whispered in his ear. "I love you too."

After that, they both stood un-speaking on the balcony knowing that somethings, like love are everlasting.

END

* * *

Author's Note: And there you have it. This story is now officialy complete. Of all the stories that I left hanging, this one is nearest and dearest to my heart because it combined several sparky snippets into one massive story. Originally I had planned for it to go longer, but with the utter decimation of this ship, I just lost the will to continue on. However, I have since found a little bit of the magic that made writing sparky so much fun and I do hope that you readers have enjoyed the last couple chapters. Thank you once again for reading, especially those who have been left wondering if this story was ever going to get finished and please, leave a review if you can. Take care and always believe in sparky ever after. ~Anjirika


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